The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

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The diagram highlights the various stages in the production of
sugar
Use synonyms
from
sugar
Use synonyms
cane.
Overall
Linking Words
, the process consists of 7 stages, beginning with
Use synonyms
sugar
Check wording
the growth of sugar
show examples
cane
is grown
Verb problem
apply
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and ending with
drying
Correct article usage
the drying
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and cooling of
sugar
Use synonyms
crystals.
To begin
Linking Words
with,
sugar
Use synonyms
canes are grown
around
Change preposition
for around
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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12-18 months.
Initially
Linking Words
, the
sugar
Use synonyms
canes are harvested either by hand or using harvesting machines.
Next,
Linking Words
sugar
Use synonyms
canes are crushed.
As a result
Linking Words
, juice is made and passed through a limestone filter.
Following
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
, juice
is
Verb problem
apply
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became syrup and is heated big pot.
Then
Linking Words
, it
is separated
Wrong verb form
separates
show examples
sugar
Use synonyms
crystals from syrup. After being dried,
sugar
Use synonyms
crystals are cooled.
Finally
Linking Words
,
cooling
Replace the word
cooled
sugar
Use synonyms
is ready for storage and distribution.

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words sugar with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • mature
  • harvest
  • extract
  • purification
  • impurities
  • evaporation
  • thick syrup
  • crystallization
  • centrifugation
  • molasses
  • raw sugar crystals
  • refinement
  • purify
  • whiten
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