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Writing Samples
Band 7

The chart below shows global sales of the top five mobile phone brands between 2009 and 2013.

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The bar chart gives information about global
sales
Use synonyms
 of the top five mobile phone companies, including
Samsung
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,
Apple
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,
Nokia
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, LG and ZTE, between 2009 and 2013, measured in millions.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is evident that the
sales
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 of
Nokia
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 and LG companies reduced over the period,
while
Linking Words
 the
sales
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 of
Samsung
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 and
Apple
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 increased.
By contrast
Linking Words
, the
sales
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 of ZTE remained stable, despite a slight rise. In 2009,
Nokia
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 was the most popular
brands
Fix the agreement mistake
brand
show examples
, which recorded considerable
sales
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 at around 450
million
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.
Samsung
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also
Linking Words
 represented
second
Correct article usage
the second
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 position at about 230
million
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.
However
Linking Words
,
Apple
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 registered the
least
Correct word choice
fewest
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sales
Use synonyms
 at approximately 20
million
Use synonyms
. By 2013,
Use synonyms
Nokia brand’s
Correct word order
Nokia’s brand
show examples
sales
Use synonyms
slightly
Verb problem
had slightly
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 reduced to around 430
million
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 in 2018 before sharply declining to 240
million
Use synonyms
at the end
Linking Words
 of the period.
Similarly
Linking Words
,
LG
Correct article usage
the LG
show examples
 company experienced a gradual decline, falling from around 110
million
Use synonyms
 to 80
million
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.
In contrast
Linking Words
,
Samsung
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 significantly rose to 455
million
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,
whereas
Linking Words
Apple
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 marked substantial growth, reaching around 150
million
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. Meanwhile, ZTE
sales
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 remained stable
around
Change preposition
at around
show examples
 50
million
Use synonyms
, despite a brief rise.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 70%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words sales, samsung, apple, nokia, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "reduced" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "rise" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "stable" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Global sales
  • Mobile phone brands
  • Market share
  • Trends
  • Growth
  • Decline
  • Technological advancements
  • Innovation
  • Consumer preferences
  • Demographics
  • Market dominance
  • Brand loyalty
  • Comparative analysis
  • Sales figures
  • Data interpretation
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