IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

There is growing evidence that man-made activities are making global temperatures higher. What might be the man-made causes of temperatures rising? How should we deal with this problem? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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There is developing evidence that anthropological activities are responsible
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 global warming.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss the reasons
of temperatures rising
Correct word order
for the rise in temperatures
show examples
, how man-made activities are contributing to it
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 different
approch
Correct your spelling
approaches
 to mitigate the crisis.
However
Linking Words
, we need to identify global warming first. Global warming is
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 rising temperature on earth surface
due to
Linking Words
 green house affect. The
later
Use the right word
latter
show examples
 is
collection
Correct article usage
a collection
show examples
 of gases which
emited
Wrong verb form
are emitted
show examples
 from factories and

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task response
Answer all parts of the task. You need to explain the causes and the ways to deal with the problem more fully.
coherence and cohesion
Use clear main ideas in each part. One idea should lead to the next in a simple way.
task response
Give one or two clear examples to support your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Add a full ending. Your essay stops too early, so the reader cannot see your final view.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words like first, also, because, and finally to join ideas.
task response
You introduce the topic and say what the essay will discuss.
task response
Your first part shows you know the essay is about man-made causes of global warming.
coherence and cohesion
There is a basic start to the structure with an opening paragraph.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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