IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The best way to sole the environmental problem is to increase the price of fuel .To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement.

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Many individuals believe that the best way to address environmental issues is to
increase
Use synonyms
 the price of
fuel
Use synonyms
. I completely disagree with
this
Linking Words
 statement because it can impact large industries and can cause financial burden on low-income families.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, non-renewable resources,
such
Linking Words
 as
diseal
Correct your spelling
diesel
 and
petrol
Punctuation problem
petrol,
show examples
 are
also
Linking Words
 used in areas other than transportation.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
fuel
Use synonyms
 is required in many large machines used in industries.
Rise
Correct article usage
A rise
show examples
 in the
prices
Use synonyms
 of
fuel
Use synonyms
 can eventually
increase
Use synonyms
 the cost of making a product in these factories, which can eventually lead to
rise
Correct article usage
a rise
show examples
 in inflation in the country.
Consequently
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 can negatively impact the economic development of a country.
For example
Linking Words
, developing countries like Pakistan faced economic challenges during the recent Iran-USA war
due to
Linking Words
 the
increase
Use synonyms
 in
fuel
Use synonyms
prices
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, many people use public transport
everyday
Rephrase
every day
show examples
 to travel to their work. Rise in the
fuel
Use synonyms
prices
Use synonyms
 can lead to
Use synonyms
increase
Correct article usage
an increase
show examples
 in transportation charges and
communting
Correct your spelling
commuting
 expenses.
This
Linking Words
 can create
financial
Correct article usage
a financial
show examples
 burden on low-income families and affect individuals with low-paying jobs.
Moreover
Linking Words
, many drivers and transport business owners can face losses
due to
Linking Words
 high
prices
Use synonyms
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 can create unemployment and economic crises in the country.
For instance
Linking Words
, many drivers quit their
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
due to
Linking Words
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
 of profit in their businesses. To sum it up,
rising
Verb problem
raising
show examples
 the
prices
Use synonyms
 of
fuel
Use synonyms
 is not a viable solution to tackle environmental issues. Rather
a
Punctuation problem
, a
show examples
different approach is required,
such
Linking Words
 as
rising
Verb problem
raising
show examples
 awareness
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 and being more mindful when using vehicles. These approaches can eventually be fruitful in the long run.

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task response
Answer the question more directly. You say you fully disagree, but you should explain more about what would work better for the environment.
coherence and cohesion
Use one clear main idea in each body paragraph and explain it step by step.
task response
Add a stronger link to the environment. Most of your essay talks about cost and money, not enough about environmental problems.
coherence and cohesion
Check small word forms and spelling, because some errors make the flow less smooth.
task response
Your examples are helpful, but they can be more exact and shorter.
task response
You clearly state your opinion in the introduction and keep it through the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear beginning, middle, and end.
coherence and cohesion
You use linking words like 'To begin with', 'Furthermore', and 'To sum it up' well.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • fossil fuels
  • greenhouse gas emissions
  • sustainability
  • alternative energy sources
  • air pollution
  • traffic congestion
  • public transportation
  • energy-efficient technologies
  • environmental initiatives
  • reforestation
  • wildlife conservation
  • economic impact
  • innovation
  • policy measures
  • carbon footprint
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