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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Many people today think that homework is still an important part of school while others think that it is becoming outdated. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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In
this
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 modern era, it is undeniable that education plays an imperative role in the humans’ development. Some individuals believe that
school
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homework
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 is always vital for
students
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,
whereas
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 others believe that
this
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 trend is old in
schools
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. In
this
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 essay, I will discuss the important role
play
Wrong verb form
played
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 by
school
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homework
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 in the student’s development
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 my position is argued with an explanation.
Firstly
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,
homework
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 from
schools
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help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
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students
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 to build a good habit to do
self
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study
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 at
home
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. To illustrate, some
students
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 do not like
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study
Wrong verb form
studying
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 at
home
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, and they never know how to make good notes or do hard
work
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 in studies for jobs
but
Punctuation problem
, but
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 when they start doing
school
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work
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 at
home
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 provided by their teachers,
then
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 they start knowing the ways of learning or
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self
Correct your spelling
self-study
study
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.
For instance
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, as per
recent
Correct article usage
a recent
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 report by
The
Fix capitalization
the
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 Indian Department
Of
Fix capitalization
of
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 Education, 70% of total
students
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 get successful in their lives who do
school
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work
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 at
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home
Punctuation problem
home,
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 provided by their teacher
Punctuation problem
, because
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because they
Correct word choice
apply
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become habitual to
do
Wrong verb form
doing
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 hard
work
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.
Thus
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,
homework
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 by institutes to their
students
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 is important for their better careers.
However
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,
others
Correct determiner usage
other
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 people
thinks
Correct subject-verb agreement
think
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 that the old idea of
homework
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 given by
schools
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 to their
students
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 is less impactful these days because learners mostly do their
work
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 with the help of
technology
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. To clarify,
technology
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 is helping
students
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 to finish their
homework
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, which
making
Wrong verb form
makes
show examples
 the effort of their teachers useless.
Technology
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 is helping
students
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 to do their
homework
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 with
any efforts
Check wording
little effort
show examples
, and
this
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making
Verb problem
is making
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 the
homework
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 less impactful.
For example
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, after
COVID
Correct article usage
the COVID
show examples
pandemics
Replace the word
pandemic
 days, most of the
students
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 were
getting fails
Wrong verb form
failing
show examples
 in their exams, and the reason was that
students
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 did their
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schools
Correct your spelling
schoolwork
work
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 with the help of
technology
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 without any
efforts
Check wording
effort
show examples
.
As a result
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, during
exams
Check wording
exam
show examples
 days they
got fail
Wrong verb form
failed
show examples
. In conclusion,
school
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homework
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 helps
students
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 to understand the meaning of
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self
Correct your spelling
self-study
study
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 and start doing hard
work
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 by completing tasks
what
Correct pronoun usage
that
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 their teachers give them. In my opinion,
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school works
Correct your spelling
schoolwork
 helps
students
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 to evaluate themselves by doing
Use synonyms
self
Correct your spelling
self-study
study
Use synonyms
 at
home
Use synonyms
.

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task response
Answer both sides in a more even way. Your view is clear, but the second side needs a bit more full support.
task response
Make your main ideas more clear. Some ideas are repeated, and some lines are hard to follow.
task response
Use examples that feel more real and more direct. Some examples now are too general or not fully clear.
coherence and cohesion
Put one main idea in each body part, then explain it step by step.
coherence and cohesion
Link your ideas with simple words like first, also, however, and as a result, but do not repeat the same pattern too much.
coherence and cohesion
Check word order and sentence form, because some parts make the meaning less clear for the reader.
task response
You answer both views and give your own opinion.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear intro, two body parts, and a conclusion.
task response
You try to use examples to support your ideas.
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