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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Fewer and fewer people today write by hand using a pen, a pencil, or brush. What are the reasons for this? Is the decline in writing by hand a positive or negative development?

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In
this
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 technologically advanced world, handwriting is uncommon. People do not prefer to
use
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 a pen
and
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or
show examples
 pencils. The driving factors behind
this
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 are speed and the ubiquity of digital gadgets.
Overall
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, it is a favourable trend including improvement in productivity and reduction in tree cutting. The primary reason for
this
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 trend is that technologies are an indispensable part of individuals' lives. Every person owns their phones, tablets, and laptops. They spend most of their
time
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 on them. They cannot
use
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 them without typing.
Furthermore
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, writing online is more comfortable than handwriting.
Instead
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 of spending
time
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 on writing physically, typing saves both
time
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 and effort.
For example
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, if people have to write an essay. An online writing and auto-correcting system can help to complete without
time
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-consuming actions.
As a result
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, many schools and learning centres started using special tablets which people can
use
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instead
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 of traditional textbooks and copybooks. There are several positive aspects of
this
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 trend. One of the important aspects is that it enhances
overall
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 productivity. Because of saving
time
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 and effort, they have extra
time
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 to complete other tasks,
such
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 as gaining international knowledge and growing professionally.
Moreover
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, it decreases the number of trees cut down. It tackled some global environmental challenges. Namely, both paper and pen are made of trees and some fuels.
For example
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, in Japan, the government fully banned the
use
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 of pen and paper.
As a result
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, the number of environmental pressing problems was reduced.
To sum up
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, reducing the
use
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 of pens, pencils, and brushes is
overall
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 advantageous. It is derived from the fame of technologies and conveniences.

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task response
Answer both parts more fully. You give reasons and your view, but the bad side is very short.
task response
Add one clear bad point before you say why the good side is stronger.
task response
Use more real and clear examples. Some examples feel too general or not fully true.
coherence and cohesion
Make each body paragraph have one main idea only, then explain it step by step.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas more clearly with simple words like first, also, for example, as a result, however.
coherence and cohesion
Check sentence connection. A few lines are hard to follow because the grammar breaks the flow.
task response
You answer the full question and give a clear opinion in the introduction and end.
task response
Your main ideas are on topic: digital tools, speed, work output, and less paper use.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear basic shape: introduction, two body parts, and conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
You use examples to support your ideas, which helps the reader follow your points.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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