Some people believe money is best gift for teenagerswhiel others disagree.discuss both views

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Some individuals argue that offering money as

gift

Correct article usage

a gift

show examples

is more beneficial for adolesences

while

Linking Words

others believe that gifts should be more special in a way that

present

Correct subject-verb agreement

presents

show examples

the emotional bond with them. In my opinion, special presents

fosters

Correct subject-verb agreement

foster

show examples

the pure relationships between human particulary the

teenagers

Use synonyms

. Even though

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

the difficult

econonmic

Replace the word

economic

situation

that

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

requires

to act practically

Replace the word

practical action

Firstly

Linking Words

, giving

teenagers

Use synonyms

money could be more practical as they can buy what they actually need. Pressing economic status made affording even essential things impossible

Punctuation problem

, so

show examples

gift money can

solve

Verb problem

help solve

show examples

or assist

to solve

Change preposition

in solving

show examples

the problem.

For instance

Linking Words

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

collecting contributions

for

Change preposition

from

show examples

different relatives may help to afford essential items

such

Linking Words

laptop

Correct article usage

a laptop

show examples

Therefore

Linking Words

Correct pronoun usage

it is

show examples

believed to be more

benefial

Correct your spelling

beneficial

On the other hand

Linking Words

Teenagers

Use synonyms

are still

independand

Correct your spelling

independent

financially, where their

parent

Fix the agreement mistake

parents

show examples

are responsible

Change preposition

for

show examples

managing the situation to cover requirements

affectivly

Correct your spelling

effectively

.People gift

teenagers

Use synonyms

only always shows the emotions toward each other, and they are evidence of the care and

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

effort between individuals.

For example

Linking Words

, start from

remeber

Correct your spelling

remembering

best

Correct article usage

the best

show examples

suit

you

Change preposition

for you

show examples

and the occasion In conclusion, special gifts are crucial to prove the strong relationships that

relates

Correct subject-verb agreement

relate

show examples

someone with adolesence, so

Fix the agreement mistake

they

show examples

should be emotional and teach them to embrace

the

Correct article usage

their

show examples

emotions.

omerelsiercv35

Jun 30, 2026

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task response

Answer both sides more fully. Say why money is good, and why special gifts are good, with equal detail.

task response

Make your opinion very clear from start to end. Keep the same view in all parts.

task response

Add one clear example for each main idea. This will make your points stronger.

coherence and cohesion

Use clear topic sentences at the start of each body paragraph.

coherence and cohesion

Link ideas with simple words like first, also, however, for example, and therefore.

coherence and cohesion

Check that each sentence connects well to the next one. Some parts now are hard to follow.

task response

You discussed both views and gave your own opinion.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

task response

You tried to use an example to support your idea.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
26
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

201 words

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