Some people say that it is beneficial for young people to visit different countries of the world, others oppose. Do you agree or disagree? Provide reasons and support them with your own examples.

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Young
people
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are now encouraged to set out and explore the world so that they can experience more of
life
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before they settle down as adults,
while
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some
people
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might think that they should spend their student
years
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prioritising academic
prowesses
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pursuits
. I firmly believe that visiting
differents
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different
countries can provide more exclusive benefits and allow us to look at various
spice
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aspects
show examples
of
life
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Firstly
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, we should consider why
people
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should even bother spending valuable time and money on finding their way
abroads
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abroad
. The most notable reason is the
life
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experience they can receive. Different cultures can have varying outlooks on work ethics, manners, recreations or even their beliefs.
Travelers
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Travellers
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, especially exchange students, can not only learn about these differences but
also
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adopt and
incoporate
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incorporate
them into their
life
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back home,
consequently
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promoting cultural diversity.
Secondly
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,
this
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also
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allows for self-discovery and finding what one's true passions
.
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are.
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Time abroad could be spent on relaxation as a break from the constant pressure in school, students can
then
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make plans for activities they couldn't
otherwise
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and
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do and
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perhaps even stumbling on a career path that
fascinate
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fascinates
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them deeply.
However
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, opposing views concerning the matter usually stem from the fact that the period students spent abroad often overlaps with the
last
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few
years
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of high school or the start of their
university's
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university
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years
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,
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.
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As a result
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, worried parents would subject going abroad
citing
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, citing
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the drop in academic performance
fearing
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, fearing
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that their children will fall behind.
This
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is true to a certain level
,
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;
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youngsters might have to restart their school
years
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but
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, but
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the personal growth they gained can easily outweigh it.
Besides
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,
this
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can
results
Wrong verb form
result
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in
a
Correct article usage
apply
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more thoughtful and innovative workers when they graduate. In conclusion, Young
people
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should
defenitely
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definitely
spend time abroad if they have the chance to, because it encourage developments and exploring different views

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task response
Answer the question more fully. Say clearly why you agree, and keep this clear in all parts.
task response
Add one or two clear real examples. This will make your ideas stronger and more full.
task response
Explain each main idea a bit more. Some points are good, but they need more detail.
coherence and cohesion
Use clearer topic sentences at the start of each body part.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas more smoothly. Some sentences are long and hard to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Check paragraph order and sentence breaks. A few places need better control.
task response
You give a clear opinion in the introduction.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear beginning, middle, and end.
coherence and cohesion
Main ideas are mostly easy to see.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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