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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people believe that advertising does a great job of persuading people to buy things. Others think that advertising has become so common that people no longer even notice it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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It is often argued that
advertisements
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 can convince some
individuals
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 to purchase several products,
while
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 others believe that
people
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 are used to advertising
,
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apply
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 and have no impact on them. I strongly believe that marketing has a great influence on the community to persuade them to purchase items.
This
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 essay will discuss both views before explaining why
advertisements
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 influence
people
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 to make purchases. On one hand, many
people
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 believe that the way
advertisements
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 are displayed is noticeable, and no one is convinced anymore.
This
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 is mainly because
,
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 many companies use social media platforms to sell their products, but because of the high volume of digital posts
,
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 and many competitors in the market, the audience will not engage with the advertising posts.
For instance
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, many brands claim that audiences these days are used to our campaigns, and that can be seen in the number of leads in our data analytics.
On the other hand
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, others argue that these advertising campaigns have a significant influence on
individuals
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 because companies understand the needs of the market and reflect that creatively in their marketing process, which can lead to
persuade
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persuading
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 consumers to make their purchases. A clear example of
this
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 can be seen during the summer season, when many companies hire professional designers to reflect their creativity on the
advertisements
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 to capture the attention of the audience. In conclusion,
while
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 some
people
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 support the idea that advertising campaigns have no impact on
people
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, others believe that these
advertisements
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 play a vital role in increasing the desire within
individuals
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 to buy. Personally, I believe that modern
advertisements
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 are
analyzed
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analysed
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 perfectly based on the needs of the market
,
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apply
show examples
 and reflected proficiently on the display of the digital posts to convince
individuals
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.

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task response
Answer both sides more fully. The first side is there, but it is a bit short.
task response
Give a clearer own view in the body, not only in the end.
task response
Use more clear and real examples. Some examples are too general.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas in a simple and smooth way. At times, some long sentences are hard to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Make each main point grow step by step: point, reason, example, result.
coherence and cohesion
Be careful with repeated ideas about social media and digital posts. Try to add new support instead.
task response
You answer both views and give your opinion.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear intro, two body parts, and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Most ideas stay on topic.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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