Some people say that all secondary and higher secondary school students should be taught how to manage money as it is an important skill. Do you agree or disagree with this argument?

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Money
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is a valuable asset in one's life. It is widely believed that universities should teach
money
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management skills. I totally agree with the above-mentioned notion because it is a basic life skill. Commencing with the most prominent reason, learning institutions should educate the youth about smart spending because it is a key skill. School students will eventually need to use cash for travel, food, study, and shopping.
For instance
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, many youngsters today are influenced by
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and social media and often buy items they do not actually need, so they should learn how to plan spending, save a portion of their income and avoid waste.
As a result
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, financial education is essential for helping students to distinguish between their needs and wants and spend
money
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more wisely. Another important reason is that financial literacy can prevent children from falling into debt. In the modern era, young people start using credit cards or borrowing
money
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without understanding the interest rates or repayment responsibilities. By learning budgeting and
money
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management at school, they can avoid unnecessary debt and achieve financial security in the future. In conclusion, I strongly believe that schools should teach financial education because it enables students to manage cash wisely and avoid financial problems.
Therefore
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,
this
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subject will
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prepare them to become responsible and independent adults.

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task response
Keep your main idea the same all through the essay. The topic says secondary and higher secondary school students, but your essay says universities first and then schools later. This can make your answer less clear.
task response
Add one more clear example to support your second main point about debt. This will make your ideas stronger and more complete.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure each body paragraph starts with one clear main idea and then explain it step by step. Your ideas are good, but some parts can be linked more smoothly.
coherence and cohesion
Check small word errors in the conclusion, like 'will would'. Small errors can make the ending less clear.
task response
You answer the question clearly and give a strong opinion from the start.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with introduction, two body paragraphs, and conclusion.
task response
Your first body paragraph has a useful example about social media and buying things people do not need.
coherence and cohesion
Linking words like 'for instance', 'as a result', and 'in conclusion' help the reader follow your ideas.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • manage money
  • life skill
  • secondary school students
  • higher secondary students
  • budget
  • save money
  • spending plan
  • waste money
  • bank account
  • bank card
  • debt
  • interest
  • online shopping
  • compare prices
  • financial problems
  • real-life skill
  • practical subject
  • equal chance
  • money habits
  • future needs
  • cost of living
  • basic math skills
  • consumer knowledge
  • avoid scams
  • responsible spending
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