IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 1

Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give a reason for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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The comparison of
sepending
Correct your spelling
spending
 more money on
railways
Use synonyms
 rather than
roads
Use synonyms
 is unfair. Both are
infrastructure
Correct article usage
the infrastructure
show examples
 of any
city
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but
Punctuation problem
, but
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 each has different users. On one hand, the
railways
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 are more used
from
Change preposition
by
show examples
 people who
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
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 low income.
Thats
Correct your spelling
That's
 why
its
Correct pronoun usage
it's
show examples
 always crowded and most of
thefts
Correct article usage
the thefts
show examples
happens
Correct subject-verb agreement
happen
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 there. Even when governments improve these
railways
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the
Punctuation problem
, the
show examples
 same
reputaion
Correct your spelling
reputation
 will still
the
Verb problem
be the
show examples
 same as before.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, when money
well
Verb problem
is well
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 spent on
roads
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, the
Use synonyms
city
Check wording
city's
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 image will improve extremely. More tourists will
visita
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visit
 the
city
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, more businesses will spot
this
Linking Words
city
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.
This
Linking Words
 is why
i belive
Correct your spelling
I believe
 the good investment
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the
roads
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 will
get
Verb problem
bring
show examples
 more
benfit
Correct your spelling
benefits
 to the
city
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 and its people.
To conclude
Linking Words
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
, the investment
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 both
roads
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 and
railways
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 will
benfit
Correct your spelling
benefit
 the
city
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 and its infrastructure. But the improvement of the
roads
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 will
reflects
Wrong verb form
reflect
show examples
 on the
Use synonyms
city
Check wording
city's
show examples
 image better.

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task response
Score: 5. Your main view is clear, but your ideas need more detail. Explain why rail is used by people with less money, and why this means governments should not spend more on it. At present, this point is not fully clear.
task response
Add one real or possible example. For example, say that a new road to an airport may help visitors and shops. Also give an example of how rail can help people get to work.
task response
Be careful with broad claims. Saying railways are crowded and have theft may be true in some places, but it does not prove that rail should get less money. Better rail may make travel safer and less crowded.
task response
State your answer more directly in the first part. For example: “I partly disagree because both roads and railways need money, but roads may need more in some cities.”
coherence and cohesion
Score: 5. Each part has one main idea, but the link between the idea and your answer is sometimes weak. After each point, say clearly how it shows that roads should get more money.
coherence and cohesion
Use a clearer plan: first say your view, then explain the good side of rail, then explain why roads may be more important, and end by repeating your view.
coherence and cohesion
Some sentences are hard to follow because key words are missing. For example, write “When money is spent well on roads” instead of “when money well spent on roads.”
coherence and cohesion
Do not repeat “city image” without more support. Add links such as “This can lead to…”, “As a result…”, and “For this reason…” to show the steps in your idea.
task response
You give a clear view: roads should get more money because they can help the city image and bring tourists and business.
task response
You answer both sides by talking about railways and roads.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear start, two main parts, and an end.
coherence and cohesion
You use simple links such as “On one hand”, “On the other hand”, and “To conclude”.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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