Some people think that zoos are all cruel and should be closed down. Others however believe that zoos can be useful in protecting wild animals. Discuss both opinions and give your own opinion.

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Some people believe that
zoos
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are cruel places and should be shut down,
while
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others think that
zoos
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are beneficial because they protect wild
animals
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. I believe that
zoos
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are very useful for protecting wildlife because they provide
animals
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with shelter, food, and clean water. On the one hand,
zoos
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are places where sick or injured wild
animals
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can receive proper care so that they can recover more quickly. They are
also
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protected from predators. Not only that, but
zoos
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also
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care for endangered species by helping them breed and increasing the populations of rare
animals
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.
Furthermore
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,
zoos
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protect
animals
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from early death, allowing endangered species to grow in number.
In addition
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,
zoos
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keep captive
animals
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safe inside secure enclosures to protect them from diseases or natural disasters that could wipe out entire species.
On the other hand
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,
animals
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kept in
zoos
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may develop zoochosis, a psychological condition caused by captivity, which can seriously affect their well-being.
Moreover
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, visitors often come to observe captive
animals
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, taking away their privacy by constantly watching them and taking photographs.
In addition
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, many
zoos
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provide enclosures that are only a tiny fraction of the
animals
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' natural habitats.
As a result
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, they cannot roam freely, hunt, or mark their territory, which may lead to muscle atrophy
due to
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a lack of exercise. In conclusion,
zoos
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have both advantages and disadvantages. They help protect and care for
animals
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, but captivity and human interference can
also
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cause them to suffer.
Therefore
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, by shifting their focus from human entertainment to wildlife conservation, modern
zoos
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can become better places for wild
animals
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.

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task response
Score: 7. This is a good answer, but your own view is not fully the same from start to end. At first, you say zoos are “very useful”. In the end, you say they have good and bad sides. Make your final view stronger: say that only well-run zoos should stay open, while bad zoos should close.
task response
Add one clear, real-type example for each side. For example, say that a zoo may help breed a rare animal, but a small cage may stop a large animal from moving as it needs to. This will make your points feel more full.
task response
Some good points need more care. For example, zoos do not always keep animals safe from disease or natural events. Say “some well-run zoos can help protect animals” rather than making a very broad claim.
coherence and cohesion
Score: 7. Your order is clear, but the first body part has many ideas in a row: food, care, predators, breeding, death, disease, and natural events. Pick two or three main ideas and explain each one more fully.
coherence and cohesion
Use fewer repeated link words, such as “In addition”. You can join ideas in a more direct way. This will make the writing flow better.
coherence and cohesion
Make the last line match your view more clearly. For example: “In my view, zoos should stay open only if they put animal care and the protection of wild animals before money and shows.”
task response
You discuss both views and give your own view clearly. Your main point is clear from the start.
task response
Your ideas are on topic. You explain how zoos can help sick animals and animals at risk, and how zoo life can harm animals.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear four-part shape: start, one side, the other side, and end.
coherence and cohesion
Linking words such as “On the one hand”, “On the other hand”, “Moreover”, and “As a result” help the reader follow your ideas.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • animal welfare
  • conservation
  • captive breeding
  • habitat
  • ethical issues
  • zoochosis
  • endangered species
  • genetic diversity
  • reintroduction programs
  • wildlife education
  • sanctuary
  • natural living conditions
  • artificial environments
  • behavioral enrichment
  • ecosystem
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