IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

water scarcity is a serious problem in many countries. What are the causes of this? And what solutions can be done by individuals and the government?

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The growing shortage of freshwater has become a pressing global concern, affecting millions of people and threatening sustainable development.
This
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 essay will examine the key causes of
this
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 problem and suggest effective measures that
both
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 individuals and
governments
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 can take to address
.
Correct pronoun usage
it.
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 One major cause of
water
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 scarcity is climate change, which has significantly disrupted natural weather patterns. As global temperatures continue to rise, droughts become more frequent
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 rainfall becomes less predictable, making it difficult for rivers, lakes, and reservoirs to replenish their
water
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 supplies. Another contributing factor is rapid population growth, which has led to a sharp increase in
water
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 consumption for domestic use, agriculture, and industry, placing enormous pressure on limited freshwater resources.
For example
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, many regions in India have experienced severe groundwater depletion
due to
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 excessive irrigation and the needs of a growing population.
Therefore
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,
both
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 environmental changes and human activities have significantly contributed to
water
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 scarcity. To address
this
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 problem effectively,
both
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 individuals and
governments
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 have
an
Correct article usage
apply
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important roles to play. Individuals can help by reducing unnecessary
water
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 consumption, repairing leaking taps, and reusing
water
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 whenever possible, as these simple actions can save a considerable amount of
water
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 over time. Meanwhile,
governments
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 should invest in modern
water
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 infrastructure, improve irrigation systems, and enforce stricter regulations to prevent
water
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 pollution and waste.
For instance
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, Singapore has successfully strengthened its
water
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 supply by investing in
water
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 recycling technology and promoting
water
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 conservation through nationwide campaigns.
Consequently
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, the combined efforts of
both
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 citizens and
governments
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 are essential to ensuring a sustainable
water
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 supply for the future. In conclusion,
this
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 growing challenge stems from
both
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 natural and human-related factors.
Although
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 it cannot be eliminated overnight, greater public awareness combined with effective government action can play a vital role in protecting freshwater resources for future generations.

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task response
Estimated score: 8. To reach 9, explain one or two ideas a little more. For example, say how better farm watering can save large amounts of water.
task response
Your solutions are good, but you could add one more clear government step, such as fixing old water pipes or making rules for farms and factories.
task response
The India example is relevant, but it could be more exact. Say that too much pumping of ground water for farming lowers the water level.
coherence and cohesion
The flow is strong. Still, you can make the first cause paragraph even smoother by linking population growth more directly to the India example.
coherence and cohesion
Avoid a small grammar error: write “both individuals and governments have important roles to play”, not “have an important roles to play”.
coherence and cohesion
Do not use too many linking words in every sentence. Your use is good now, but keep links natural and let the ideas do the work.
task response
You answer all parts of the question: causes, what people can do, and what the state can do.
task response
Your main ideas are clear. Climate change, more people, saving water, and better water systems are all on-topic.
task response
The examples of India and Singapore are useful and help make your ideas more real.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear shape: introduction, causes, solutions, and conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Each body paragraph has one main job, so the reader can follow your ideas easily.
coherence and cohesion
Linking words such as “For example”, “Meanwhile”, and “In conclusion” are used well.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • water scarcity
  • overconsumption
  • depletion
  • inefficient
  • outdated irrigation
  • climate change
  • potable water
  • water-efficient appliances
  • rainwater harvesting
  • conservation
  • modernizing infrastructure
  • environmental regulations
  • sustainable water management
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