In modern times, young adults are spending less time with their families and more time with their friends. Why has this change occurred? Do you think parents should force their children to spend more time at home?

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There is a widely held view that in the fast-paced world,

youngsters

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have been spending most of their

time

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with friends

instead

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of their family members for the past decade.

This

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essay will outline the reasons for

this

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trend and

further

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argue why it is not a good idea to force

youngsters

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to spend more

time

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at home.

To begin

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with, One of the main reasons why it is trending that adolescents are now spending more

time

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outdoors with their peers rather than with their

families

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is that their parents choose to lead work-oriented lifestyles over those that are dedicated to

families

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. When the amount of

time

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spent with

families

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is not proportionated with that spent on working, many parents fail to provide enough

time

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to bond with their offspring, and

as a result

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, children turn to their friends to enjoy their free

time

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For instance

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, rather than staying indoors, many affluent Gen Z in different parts of the world are usually seen hanging out at cafes or going to a movie with friends during the weekend. There is a wide range of strategies that can be used to arrest

this

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trend.

According to

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psychologists and medical experts, children should not be forcefully banned from outdoor activities. Doing so would limit their freedom to explore the world and potentially hinder them from transforming into the person they want to be in the future.

For example

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, many schoolchildren in high school always volunteer in various charity events in order to help the communities

as well as

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explore what they really want to do in life.From the general public, adolescents with

this

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kind of mindset would grow into well-rounded citizens, contributing significantly to their societies and their nation.

To conclude

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, many

youngsters

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choose to spend less

time

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with their

families

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because of the busy schedule of their parents

due to

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which they feel unwanted and unloved.

Further

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, I believe that

youngsters

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should not be forced to spend more

time

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at home because it can become the major reason for the development of destructive behaviour in children.

yektaghandi.78Wed Feb 19 2025

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task achievement

Consider providing more specific examples or evidence to support your claims. This can strengthen your arguments and make them more persuasive.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure consistent use of tense and avoid errors in word choice to improve clarity. This will help enhance the overall flow of your writing.

task achievement

Try to elaborate more on the societal impacts this trend has on families and young adults. This additional depth can improve your overall argument and support your viewpoints better.

structure

Your introduction clearly outlines the main points you will discuss in the essay, which is a great way to guide the reader.

idea development

You present valid reasons and examples for why young adults are spending less time with their families, indicating good understanding of the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

344 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

independence
establish
identity
influence
social media
digital communication
commitments
pressure
academic
profession
prioritize
cultural shifts
societal shifts
peer relationships
emotional support
guidance
voluntary
autonomy
balance
resilient
overbearing

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In modern times, young adults are spending less time with their families and more time with their friends. Why has this change occurred? Do you think parents should force their children to spend more time at home?

Your opinion

Food travels thousands of miles from farm to consumers. Some people believe we should buy food from local farmers to protect the environment and help the local business. Do advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

It is commonly believed that nowadays main factors that affect a child's development are media, pop culture and friends. A different point of view is that family plays the most significant role. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people feel that entertainers (e.g. film stars, pop musicians or sports stars) are paid too much money. Do you agree or disagree? Which other types of jobs should be highly paid? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some believe that a tax on companies should be introduced to reduce industrial pollution. Others believe that other measures should be taken to solve the problem. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.