IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think litter in public places is a serious problem. Others think that this is not a serious problem. What is your opinion about this?

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Write on this topic →
Introduction
Whether to throw waste in common
places
Use synonyms
 has become a topic of debate.
While
Linking Words
 some
people
Use synonyms
 believe that disposing
unwanted
Change preposition
of unwanted
show examples
 things in open areas is not a big issue, I
pesonally
Correct your spelling
personally
 believe that it is a serious crime. In my opinion, littering in public
places
Use synonyms
 will damage the environment, and can affect
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
tourism.
Therefore
Linking Words
, the administration should take strict actions against
this
Linking Words
 act and reduce the chances of cluttering.
Body paragraph 1
On the one hand,
people
Use synonyms
 believe that disposing
garbage
Change preposition
of garbage
show examples
 in public areas is a non-civilised activity, and can result in damage of environment.
For instance
Linking Words
, if
people
Use synonyms
 are throwing plastic waste, domestic waste or daily rubbish
on the
Change preposition
in
show examples
 public
places
Use synonyms
,
then
Linking Words
 it will contaminate
soil
Correct article usage
the soil
show examples
 or
nearer
Correct word choice
nearby
show examples
 water bodies.
Due to
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
, various environmental issues occur and can affect
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
individuals' health.
Body paragraph 2
Furthermore
Linking Words
, littering in public
places
Use synonyms
 can eventually affect
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
tourism.
Tourist
Fix the agreement mistake
Tourists
show examples
 who
travelled
Wrong verb form
travel
show examples
 from other countries or other cities can get
bad
Correct article usage
a bad
show examples
 impression of the place, and they can avoid
to visit
Wrong verb form
visiting
show examples
 again
due to
Linking Words
 the cluttered place and
harmfull
Correct your spelling
harmful
 smell of garbage. In
this
Linking Words
 way, revenue generation will
get
Verb problem
be
show examples
 affected and can result in low economic growth.
For example
Linking Words
, Dubai is known for its cleanliness and strict rules against littering.
Due to
Linking Words
 the clean and tidy tourist
places
Use synonyms
, Dubai is attracting tourists around the world and generating high revenue
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 the country.
Body paragraph 3
However
Linking Words
, littering in small
amount
Check wording
amounts
show examples
 can never
be happened
Wrong verb form
happen
show examples
.
As
Correct word choice
This
show examples
this
Linking Words
 act can be repeated by one or many
people
Use synonyms
 and become a habit among citizens. It can work as a slow poison and harm the personal
as well
Correct word choice
and
show examples
 social well-being.
Conclusion
In conclusion
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 as per my opinion, littering in public
places
Use synonyms
 is a serious problem. As it can affect the surroundings and tourism.
This
Linking Words
 can slow down the economic growth of the country
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 can be handled by strict rules and regulations.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Answer both sides more fully. You say some people think litter is not serious, but you do not clearly explain why they may think this. Add one short idea, such as: some may feel that one small item of waste does not cause much harm.
task response
Make your main ideas more exact. Instead of saying litter will “damage the environment”, explain the result: plastic can stay in land and water for many years, and waste can make people ill.
task response
The third body part is not fully clear. “Littering in small amount can never be happened” does not show your meaning well. You could say: “Even small amounts of litter matter because, when many people do it, the waste soon builds up.”
task response
Your ending repeats the main view well, but it could end more strongly by joining the key points: litter harms nature, health, tourism, and money made by a place.
coherence and cohesion
Keep each body part focused on one main point. The first can be about nature and health; the second can be about tourism and money; the last idea about small acts becoming a habit can be joined to the first part or made into a fuller body part.
coherence and cohesion
Use links that show the exact relation between ideas. For example, use “As a result” before the effect on health, and use “This means that” before the effect on tourism and money.
coherence and cohesion
Avoid repeating the same words too often, such as “public places”, “can affect”, and “serious problem”. You can also use “shared areas”, “this issue”, “harm”, and “lead to” where they fit.
coherence and cohesion
Some sentences are hard to follow because of word choice or form. For example, write “Tourists who travel from other countries may get a bad view of the place” and “the harmful smell of rubbish may stop them from coming back.”
task response
Your view is clear from the start: litter in public places is a serious problem. You give two main reasons: harm to nature and harm to tourism.
task response
The Dubai example is useful and linked to your point about clean places bringing more visitors and money.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear shape: an opening, main body parts, a short extra point, and an ending.
coherence and cohesion
You use linking words such as “For instance”, “Furthermore”, “However”, and “In conclusion” to guide the reader.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: