IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people think that machine translation is highly developed in today's society. Therefore, it is not necessary for students to learn a foreign language. What's your opinion?

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Write on this topic →
Introduction
Linguistic capabilities are apparently essential and considered a great personality trait in the present context. More interestingly, modern individuals are now given the golden opportunity to overcome
language
Use synonyms
 barriers with
wide
Correct article usage
a wide
show examples
 range of supportive
translation
Use synonyms
 facilities and applications. Yet, the trend is
benificial
Correct your spelling
beneficial
, it tends to generate negative outcomes as well in terms of their trustworthiness and lack of logical learning strategies. From my perspective,
such
Linking Words
instant
Correct article usage
an instant
show examples
 learning aid could not replicate well structured
language
Use synonyms
 learning process, and the statement cannot be accepted.
Body paragraph 1
To begin
Linking Words
, the negative aspect of the trend sheds light on its destructive nature. More pathetically, with the
emerge
Replace the word
emergence
 of social media platforms
numerous
Punctuation problem
, numerous
show examples
 websites and AI tools
are
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
 come to light. In some cases, the education level and linguistic knowledge of
such
Linking Words
 digital creators are highly questionable.
Consequently
Linking Words
, learners, who tend to grab literacy aspects through
such
Linking Words
content
Punctuation problem
content,
show examples
 would
loss
Replace the word
lose
 social acceptance and their future opportunities
due to
Linking Words
 incorrect usage of languages.
For example
Linking Words
,
according to
Linking Words
 statistics, a considerable rate of academic
assigments
Correct your spelling
assignments
 are rejected in international universities,
due to
Linking Words
 meaningless content.
According to
Linking Words
educationalist
Check wording
educationalists
show examples
,
this
Linking Words
happen
Correct subject-verb agreement
happens
show examples
 mainly
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 because most of the non-native speakers tend to translate their
writings
Replace the word
writing
 by using AI generated approches , which
literally
Verb problem
is literally
show examples
 unhealthy in logical thinking and reasoning.
Body paragraph 2
It is worth noticing the fact that
,
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
language
Use synonyms
 learning process ought to
be included
Wrong verb form
include
show examples
 not only the
translation
Use synonyms
, but
also
Linking Words
 reading, listening, writing, and speaking components to improve proper understanding. In that aspect,
such
Linking Words
translation
Use synonyms
 options cannot strengthen the foreign
language
Use synonyms
 skills. More importantly,
well trained
Correct your spelling
well-trained
 and qualified facilitators are required to sharpen the grammar and
pronounciation
Correct your spelling
pronunciation
 with an articulation training to be fluent .
For example
Linking Words
,
according to
Linking Words
 research
, that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
 held by global linguistic experts
students,
Correct word order
, students
show examples
 who participate in lively processed classrooms with professional teachers
tended
Wrong verb form
tend
show examples
 to showcase
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
excellent fluency in certain foreign languages
than
Rephrase
more than
show examples
,
Correct pronoun usage
those
show examples
 who
pursuaded
Wrong verb form
pursue
show examples
translation
Use synonyms
 options to learn
that
Fix the agreement mistake
those
show examples
 languages.
Conclusion
Looking from an
overall
Linking Words
perspective
Punctuation problem
perspective,
show examples
 it is worth mentioning the fact that
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 ‘Change is inevitable.’ In that aspect, every
language
Use synonyms
enthusiastic
Replace the word
enthusiast
 ought to step forward to
recognize
Change the spelling
recognise
show examples
 the importance of logical and instant learning of
language
Use synonyms
learning
Check wording
apply
show examples
in order to safeguard their future opportunities and social upbringing. More importantly, absorbing dialects
require
Correct subject-verb agreement
requires
show examples
 accepted teaching methodologies and practical
assistantship
Replace the word
assistance
 to build confidence in users.
Hence
Linking Words
, one could prove
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
beyond
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 reasonable doubt
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
that the trend is not particularly healthy, as it tends to
reflects
Wrong verb form
reflect
show examples
 negative outcomes.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Answer the key point more directly in the first paragraph. Say clearly that students should still learn a foreign language, even when machine translation is good.
task response
Develop each reason with one clear idea and a real or clearly possible example. The claims about university work and research are too general and are not explained enough.
task response
Do not use facts such as “according to statistics” or “according to research” unless you can explain the source. A simple example from school, work, or travel would be stronger.
task response
The last paragraph adds new ideas about change, future, and social life. Instead, restate your main view and briefly sum up the two reasons from the body.
coherence and cohesion
Keep each paragraph focused on one main point. In the first body paragraph, talk only about wrong or weak translation. In the second, talk only about the full skills needed to learn a language.
coherence and cohesion
Some links between ideas are hard to follow because the sentences are very long. Use shorter sentences to make the meaning clear.
coherence and cohesion
Use simple links with the right meaning. For example, use “However” to show a different view, “Therefore” to show a result, and “For example” before one clear example.
coherence and cohesion
Avoid repeating phrases such as “it is worth mentioning the fact that”. Start with the main idea instead. For example: “Machine translation cannot teach students how to speak well.”
task response
Your main view is clear: translation tools are helpful, but they cannot take the place of learning a language.
task response
You give two main reasons: tools can give wrong language, and real learning needs reading, listening, writing, and speaking.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear start, two body parts, and an ending. This makes the overall shape easy to follow.
coherence and cohesion
You use linking words such as “To begin”, “For example”, “Consequently”, and “Hence” to show the flow of ideas.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • machine translation
  • foreign language acquisition
  • cognitive abilities
  • cultural understanding
  • nuance
  • communication skills
  • human connection
  • idioms
  • context
  • error-prone languages
  • global job market
  • versatile
  • cultural content
  • competitive edge
What to do next:
Look at other essays: