IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Some people think that the amount of noise one makes should be strictly controlled. Others believe one should be free to make as much noise as one wishes. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Introduction
Folk
Fix the agreement mistake
Folks
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 argue that
neighbords
Correct your spelling
neighbours
 should be free from
noise
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 others believe that
people
Use synonyms
 should make
noise
Use synonyms
 as they hope. I strongly support the statement saying that
environment
Correct article usage
the environment
show examples
 should be quiet
especially
Punctuation problem
, especially
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 at night and early in the morning.
Therefore
Linking Words
, later during the day
Linking Words
for
Punctuation problem
, for
show examples
instance
Punctuation problem
instance,
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 12 pm
;
Punctuation problem
,
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people
Use synonyms
 should be free to be loud.
Body paragraph 1
At
first,
Linking Words
many residents work at night.
getting
Capitalize the word
Getting
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 off from work in the
morning
Punctuation problem
morning,
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 they need to
rest
Use synonyms
.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
However,
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 it is not fair to disturb them
while
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 they are sleeping.
Rest
Use synonyms
 is important for health
,
Punctuation problem
;
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 nobody should be disturbing
while
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 sleeping if there is no emergency.
Body paragraph 2
Secondly
Linking Words
,
i
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I
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 partially supported the ideology saying that
people
Use synonyms
 should be free to
maake
Correct your spelling
make
 as much
noise
Use synonyms
 as one wishes. It is crucial to celebrate memorable culture, whenever
time
Correct article usage
the time
show examples
has come
Wrong verb form
comes
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 to be with family and friends ; making barbecue
for
Punctuation problem
, for
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 exemple for
thanksgiving
Capitalize the proper name
Thanksgiving
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, christmas etc. These moments have to be celebrated;
neighbors
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neighbours
show examples
 expect that.
Conclusion
Overall
Linking Words
,
community
Correct article usage
the community
show examples
 should be
Use synonyms
noise free
Correct your spelling
noise-free
 because citizens need to
rest
Use synonyms
 after work.
base
Fix capitalization
Based
show examples
 on their schedule
morning
Punctuation problem
, morning
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 and night
for
Punctuation problem
, for
show examples
 these
reasons
Punctuation problem
reasons,
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 the environment has to be quiet enough to promote a better
rest
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, for special
occasion
Check wording
occasions
show examples
, like hollydays
people
Use synonyms
 should be allowed to celebrate as they want with events or activities.

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task response
You answer both sides and give your own view. However, the first side needs more detail. Explain why noise rules are needed for all people, not only night workers. You could add children, old people, sick people, and people who work from home.
task response
Your view is clear: quiet times are needed, but people may celebrate at some times. Make this rule more clear. Say who should set the times, what noise is okay, and what noise is not okay.
task response
Your examples of barbecues and holidays fit the topic. Give one more clear example, such as loud music late at night in a flat, or building work early in the day.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear start, two main parts, and an ending. Use clearer links between ideas. Try: “On the one hand”, “On the other hand”, “For this reason”, and “In my view”.
coherence and cohesion
Keep each main part on one idea. In the first part, start with the need for rest, then explain the health effect, then give an example. In the second part, start with special events, then explain why some noise is fair, then give an example.
coherence and cohesion
Some sentences are hard to follow because they are too long or not complete. For example, write: “After work, they need to rest.” Also write “Based on their work times” instead of “base on their schedule”.
coherence and cohesion
Use the same words for the main idea. Choose “noise”, “quiet”, and “neighbours”, and use them in a clear way. This will make your writing easier to read.
task response
You discuss the need for quiet and the need for freedom at special times. Your own view is clear from the start.
task response
The points about sleep, health, family time, and holidays are useful and fit the question.
coherence and cohesion
Your writing has an introduction, two body parts, and a conclusion. This gives the essay a clear shape.
coherence and cohesion
Words such as “However”, “Secondly”, and “On the other hand” show that you are trying to link your ideas.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • noise pollution
  • mental and physical well-being
  • hearing loss
  • sleep disturbances
  • stress levels
  • freedom of expression
  • cultural expression
  • social interactions
  • economic benefits
  • property values
  • tourism and hospitality
  • entertainment and construction industries
  • thoughtful noise regulations
  • public health
  • economic and cultural considerations
  • zone-based noise control
  • flexibility
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