IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

•It is thought by some that it is better to live in a city while others believe that life is beer in the countryside. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

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Introduction
Nowadays, certain
people
Use synonyms
 think that urban
life
Use synonyms
 is better than rural
,
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life, while
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while
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
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others are completely opposite to
this
Linking Words
 predicament.
Although
Linking Words
,
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apply
show examples
 city residents might enjoy modern technological facilities, better job opportunities and
modern
Correct article usage
a modern
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 lifestyle,
people
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 in rural areas have
close-knitted
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close-knit
 communities,
sense
Correct article usage
a sense
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 of belonging, and enjoy the peaceful and
pollution free
Correct your spelling
pollution-free
 environment.
Body paragraph 1
Firstly
Linking Words
, a growing number of
people
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 have chosen to live in cities for various reasons like modern lifestyle, technology and infrastructure, and better opportunities. City residents have access to hospitals, schools, universities and reliable transports which has improved their lifestyle, job opportunities, and emergency healthcare.
Although
Linking Words
,
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apply
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 urban
life
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 has
it's
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its
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 own drawbacks like air and noise pollution, housing costs and fast-paced
life
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, it is still worth
because
Correct pronoun usage
it because
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 of
it's
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its
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 professional and
finacial
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financial
 advantages espeacially to
bussiness
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business
people
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.
Body paragraph 2
On the other hand
Linking Words
, rural places provide a very quiet, peaceful
life
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 without any air or noise pollution, which is mostly suitable for
older
Correct article usage
the older
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 demographic. Countryside residence provides a
close-knitted
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close-knit
 social
relations
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environment
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, a sense of belonging as everyone knows each other and a
quiet
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quiet,
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 peaceful environment,
eventhough
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even though
,
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apply
show examples
 it might be difficult to find employment and will have
travel
Verb problem
to travel
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 far for everyday chores, jobs and amenities.
Conclusion
In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 country
life
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 provides a peaceful and healthy environment with better communal relationships, I
beleive
Correct your spelling
believe
 that urban cities are better for professional and financial development, better infrastructure and healthcare system. Based on which, I opine that city
life
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 is better even with all
it's
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
 drawbacks.

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task response
You discuss both city and country life and give a clear view. To make your ideas stronger, add a real example for each side, such as a city worker who can find a job near home, or an older person who enjoys clean air in the country.
task response
Explain why each point matters. For example, say how good schools and hospitals can help a family, and how a close local group can help people feel safe and less alone.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, two main parts, and an ending. The order is easy to follow. Use fewer long sentences with many ideas, as these can be hard to read.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words more carefully. Do not start many sentences with “Although”. Use “However”, “Also”, “For example”, and “As a result” to show how one idea leads to the next.
coherence and cohesion
Keep each main paragraph focused on one clear point. In the city paragraph, group services, work, and city problems in a smooth order. In the country paragraph, first explain peace and local ties, then explain limits such as work and travel.
task response
You answer all parts of the question: you describe both views and clearly say that you prefer city life.
coherence and cohesion
The use of “Firstly”, “On the other hand”, and “In conclusion” helps the reader follow your main plan.
coherence and cohesion
Your ending clearly repeats your view and gives key reasons, including work, money, health care, and city services.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • job opportunities
  • career prospects
  • public transport system
  • access to essential services
  • higher cost of living
  • traffic congestion
  • air and noise pollution
  • fast-paced lifestyle
  • a wide range of facilities
  • peaceful surroundings
  • cleaner environment
  • strong sense of community
  • close-knit community
  • slower pace of life
  • limited employment options
  • long-distance travel
  • work-life balance
  • quality of life
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