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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The diagram below shows how one type of desert, known as a rain-shadow desert, is formed. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The diagram illustrates the generation of a
rain-shadow
Use synonyms
desert
Use synonyms
, which is a
catagory
Correct your spelling
category
 of
desert
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, the main geographical features that form
Use synonyms
rain-shadow
Correct article usage
a rain-shadow
show examples
desert
Use synonyms
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 a
sea
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, a
mountain
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, and
a
Correct article usage
an
show examples
 inland
desert
Use synonyms
, with the
mountain
Use synonyms
 situated between the
sea
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 and the
desert
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. Despite thousands of kilometres, moisture created by the
sea
Use synonyms
 turns into rain on the windward side and generates dry wind on the leeward side, which results in
Use synonyms
rain-shadow
Correct article usage
a rain-shadow
show examples
desert
Use synonyms
 in the end. At the
begining
Correct your spelling
beginning
 of the process, winds
onblowing
Correct your spelling
blowing
 on the
sea
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 approach the coast and pushed steams upwards. The moist air
then
Linking Words
 converts into clouds since the temperature cools, and
then
Linking Words
 rain falls when reaching enough height. Afterwards, after reaching the peak of the
mountain
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, dry air continues over the
mountain
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 and reaches the inland
desert
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, which is situated thousands of kilometres
far
Rephrase
apply
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away from the
sea
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 and is separated by a huge
mountain
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.
As a result
Linking Words
, the special and unique weather condition forms a
rain-shadow
Use synonyms
desert
Use synonyms
.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words rain-shadow, desert, sea, mountain with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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