Some people think that governments should give financial support to creative arts such as painters and musicians. Others believe that creative artists should be funded alternative sources. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. (4th time)

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Introduction

Many inhabitants believe that

fund

Check wording

funds

show examples

should be given to talented creators rather than other alternative sources. In my personal perspective, I strongly agree that artisans need

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

comprehensive

support

Use synonyms

due to

Linking Words

several reasons that will be clarified in

this

Linking Words

essay.

Body paragraph 1

Firstly

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, giving financial

support

Use synonyms

to these characters allows them to buy anything they need. In the field of arts, there are different kinds of artists,

for instance

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, in terms of music, some played violins, pianos or guitars. And the governments cannot find out everything about their field and

their

Correct determiner usage

the

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need to invest in. Numerous people may argue that governments can

support

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one particular thing to help artisans, but

Correct subject-verb agreement

does

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everyone need that help? The answer is actually no because many creators may already

owned

Wrong verb form

own

show examples

that

Punctuation problem

, or

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some just do not need to use that.

Body paragraph 2

On the other hand

Linking Words

, funding other alternative sources

also

Linking Words

brings many benefits,

such

Linking Words

as building new infrastructure or holding art festivals. New infrastructure helps talented artists from low-income backgrounds

can

Verb problem

apply

show examples

develop

theirs

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

skills with a fully-equipped space, not only wealthy people.

In addition

Linking Words

, holding festivals attracts a variety

number

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apply

show examples

of excellent creative characters, making the festivals much more exciting and interesting.

Also

Linking Words

, these art projects can benefit tourism thanks to

its

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their

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tourists.

Conclusion

In conclusion, I do agree that

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

comprehensive

support

Use synonyms

helps all artisans to develop well-rounded.

nguyenphamlanduong

Aug 25, 2026

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task response

Answer both sides in a more even way. Your first body part says why the state should give money to artists. Your second body part says why money should go to art places and art events. Make clear that these are the “other sources” or other ways of funding in the question.

task response

State your view more clearly. You support state help, but it is not clear if you support direct money for each artist, or money for art schools, halls, and events. Choose one main view and repeat it in the end.

task response

Develop each main point with a clear reason and a real example. For example, say that a young violin player may need money for lessons and a violin, while an art hall can give low-income artists a place to work.

task response

Do not say that artists can “buy anything they need.” This is too broad. Say what they need, such as tools, lessons, travel, rent, or time to make art.

coherence and cohesion

Use a clearer four-part plan: introduction, reasons for direct state help, reasons for other funding, and conclusion. This will make the two views easy to follow.

coherence and cohesion

Start each body part with one clear main idea. For example: “Direct state funding can help artists meet their basic costs.” Then explain this idea before moving to the next point.

coherence and cohesion

Some links are not clear. “On the other hand” should introduce the other view, but your second part is about state-funded art projects. Explain who gives the money in this view, such as firms, rich people, ticket sales, or art groups.

coherence and cohesion

Use simple, correct forms: “some play the violin, piano, or guitar”; “many creators may already own it”; “develop their skills”; and “benefit tourism because they attract tourists.”

task response

You give a clear personal view in the introduction and return to it in the conclusion.

task response

You include useful ideas about helping low-income artists and about art events bringing visitors.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has an introduction, two main body parts, and a conclusion, so the reader can see the main shape of your answer.

coherence and cohesion

You use some linking words, such as “Firstly,” “On the other hand,” “In addition,” and “In conclusion.”

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

221 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

public funding
government grants
financial support
creative sector
cultural heritage
traditional art forms
talented individuals
low-income background
equal opportunities
taxpayers' money
essential public services
private sponsorship
charitable foundations
corporate donors
online crowdfunding
ticket sales
artistic freedom
selection process
transparent criteria
a balanced approach

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Some people think that governments should give financial support to creative arts such as painters and musicians. Others believe that creative artists should be funded alternative sources. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. (4th time)

The movement of people from agricultural areas to big cities caused problems in both palces. In your oponion, what is the reason for this problem? How can it be solved?

Many people go through life doing work that they hate or have no talent for. Why does this happen? What are the consequences of this situation?

Some people claim that it is acceptable to use animals in medical research for the benefit of human beings, while others argue that it is wrong. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In many countries, people think owning a home is more important than renting one. Why is this the case? Do you think it’s a positive or negative situation?