Some people believe that children are given too much free time. They feel that this time should be used to do more school work. How do you think children should spend their free time. Reason and examples....

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Introduction
Nowadays, many people debate whether
children
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are given too much leisure
time
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or if those hours should be dedicated to additional schoolwork. In my opinion, young people need a balanced routine that divides their schedule between academic tasks and recreational activities to foster both discipline and independence.
Body paragraph 1
To begin
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with, how
children
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manage their free
time
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should depend on their age and personal development. Younger
children
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benefit greatly from unstructured play,
while
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older students require a daily schedule that balances homework with hobbies.
For instance
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, playing educational puzzles sharpens cognitive skills,
whereas
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engaging in sports or video games offers stress relief. Parents should help establish structured routines to ensure these recreational activities do not interfere with academic growth.
Body paragraph 2
Furthermore
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, free
time
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allows
children
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to pursue their individual interests and build essential social skills. When students engage in passion-driven pursuits—
such
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as learning a musical instrument or joining community groups—they build confidence and learn how to interact within society. Giving
children
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autonomy over part of their day encourages self-reliance and teaches them how to set personal goals.
Conclusion
In conclusion, allocating
time
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for both academic work and leisure is vital for a child's future success. When parents guide their
children
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to manage their
time
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effectively, it promotes lifelong learning and
overall
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well-being.

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task response
Your main view is clear: children need both school work and free time. To make it stronger, say more clearly how much time should be for each, or give a simple plan for a normal day or week.
task response
Your ideas are good, but some need more detail. For example, explain how sport can help a child do better at school, or how music can teach focus and hard work.
task response
The examples are useful, but they are quite general. Add one real-life style example, such as a child who plays football after homework and then feels less tired and more ready to study.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear four-part shape: start, two main parts, and end. Keep this clear order in future essays.
coherence and cohesion
The links between ideas work well. You can make the flow even smoother by showing the link inside each paragraph. For example, after sport, explain that less stress can lead to better focus on school work.
coherence and cohesion
The first main paragraph has several ideas: age, play, puzzles, sport, games, and parents. Choose fewer ideas and explain each one more fully, so the paragraph feels less crowded.
task response
You answer the full question and give a clear view from the start. You also keep the same view in the end.
task response
You include both learning needs and personal growth, which gives your answer a balanced and thoughtful view.
coherence and cohesion
Each paragraph has one main focus, and the order of ideas is easy to follow.
coherence and cohesion
The opening and final paragraphs clearly frame the essay and help the reader understand your main message.
Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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