IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Recycling is a pointless activity, it is fraught with inefficiency. Governments need to develop policies to tackle waste and other issues at source. To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

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Introduction
Many people are sceptical about
recycling
Correct article usage
the recycling
show examples
 campaign that has been promoted in recent years,
while
Linking Words
 others prefer that
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 is the one who is responsible
to regulate
Change preposition
for regulating
show examples
 the environmental issues through better policy.
Although
Linking Words
 I believe that the key method in tackling
waste
Use synonyms
 and other environmental
Use synonyms
crisis
Fix the agreement mistake
crises
show examples
 is by developing proper policies, recycling is
also
Linking Words
important
Correct article usage
an important
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elements
Fix the agreement mistake
element
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 to speed up
this
Linking Words
 effort.
Body paragraph 1
Environmental
crisis
Use synonyms
 is systematic issue that should be solved with effective
ragulation
Correct your spelling
regulation
. Most producers of rubbish and
emission
Check wording
emissions
show examples
 come from
post-production
Correct article usage
the post-production
show examples
waste
Use synonyms
 of industrial works.
Therefore
Linking Words
, making strict
regulation
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regulations
show examples
 to keep these companies accountable
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 what they have done will potentially reduce the
crisis
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, by taxing corporations
that
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is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 proven
in creating
Wrong verb form
to create
show examples
 high
emission
Check wording
emissions
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,
waste
Use synonyms
 and
polution
Correct your spelling
pollution
. Not only
does it can
Correct word order
can it
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 make these industries try to reduce their
waste
Use synonyms
, but
also
Linking Words
 the tax money paid by them can be used to fund climate-related actions.
Body paragraph 2
On the other hand
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, it is indeed
that
Correct word choice
true that
show examples
 recycling is related to individuals and
smaller
Correct article usage
a smaller
show examples
 scale. But if everyone takes action to apply
this
Linking Words
 recycling campaign, it will not be small anymore. I believe that simple
actions
Punctuation problem
actions,
show examples
 if conducted
cumulatively
Punctuation problem
cumulatively,
show examples
 will bring significant impacts.
For instance
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,
such
Linking Words
 donation platforms across the world that usually fund disaster
survivor
Check wording
survivors
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 are collections of
penny
Check wording
pennies
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 but gathered from millions of people
-
Punctuation problem
,
show examples
 though it can reach millions of
pound
Fix the agreement mistake
pounds
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 sterling.
Conclusion
In conclusion, I agree that the best method to tackle
environmental
Correct article usage
the environmental
show examples
crisis
Use synonyms
 is by creating proper regulations.
However
Linking Words
, recycling should be taken into consideration
whan
Correct your spelling
when
 it comes to collective actions among
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
 in boosting
environment
Replace the word
environmental
 conservation.

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task response
State your view more clearly in the first paragraph. You mostly agree that government policy is the main answer, but you also say recycling is important. Say how far you agree in one direct sentence.
task response
Develop the point about recycling more fully. Explain why it is not pointless, even if it cannot solve the waste problem on its own. You could mention saving raw materials, cutting landfill, and helping people form good habits.
task response
Your example about taxes is useful, but make it more exact. Explain what firms would do after a tax, such as using less packing or cleaner ways to make goods.
task response
The donation example shows that many small acts can add up, but it is not closely linked to recycling. Use a recycling example instead, such as a town where homes sort paper, glass, and food waste.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear order: introduction, policy paragraph, recycling paragraph, and conclusion. Keep this plan, but make the link between the two body paragraphs clearer. For example: 'While action by firms is more important, action by people still has a part to play.'
coherence and cohesion
Start each body paragraph with a direct main idea. The first could focus on why policy at the source has the biggest effect. The second could focus on why recycling still helps.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words with care. 'Therefore', 'for example', and 'on the other hand' are helpful, but some sentences need clearer cause and effect. Make sure each sentence adds to the same main point.
coherence and cohesion
Make the final paragraph shorter and more direct. Repeat your main view, then state the role of recycling in one clear final sentence.
task response
You answer both parts of the question: you discuss government action at the source and the role of recycling.
task response
Your main view is clear overall: strong rules for firms are the key way to cut waste and pollution.
task response
The tax example is relevant because it shows how government policy can change the way firms act.
coherence and cohesion
The essay is easy to follow because each main idea has its own paragraph.
coherence and cohesion
You include both an introduction and a conclusion, and they match your main view.
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