IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Your local hospital has advertised for people to do unpaid work helping at the hospitsal. You would like to do some work at the hospital in your free time. Write a letter to the hospital. In your letter -explain why you would like to do unpaid work at the hospital -say what type of unpaid work you would be able to do -give details of when you would be available for this work

7.0 / 9
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Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to express my passion for working as a volunteer at the hospital in my free time, as it can have a positive impact on my educational and professional life. The main reason for
this
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 decision is that I am studying pharmacy at university, and I believe that it can provide me with valuable opportunities to gain real-life experience, laying the foundation for my educational and professional development.
Moreover
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, through
this
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 experience, I can improve my essential skills, including communication, problem-solving, critical thinking and decision making. These skills can play an indispensable role in my professional journey. I can work in your pharmacy and provide detailed information on medications for patients, particularly senior citizens.
In addition
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, I have developed software that organises patients’ medications and offers them valuable information about healthy foods. We can introduce the application to patients to use. I would be available for work from September 26,
2026
Add a comma
2026,
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 to July 23, 2027, from 8 a.m. to 2 p.m.
However
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, I cannot work at weekends and holidays. Thank you very much for your consideration and time. I look forward to hearing from you. Yours faithfully, Mohammadreza Hadavi Bavil

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task response
Explain more clearly how your help will be useful for the hospital and its patients. For example, say that you can guide people, help staff, or give simple support in the pharmacy.
task response
Be careful with saying that you will give medicine advice to patients. As a student, you may need to work under a pharmacist and only do tasks that staff allow.
task response
Make your available days clearer. You give the time, but you should also say which weekdays you can work.
coherence and cohesion
Your letter has a clear start, middle, and end. Keep this plan: one paragraph for why you want the work, one for what you can do, and one for when you can work.
coherence and cohesion
Some sentences are long and have many ideas. Use shorter sentences to make your meaning easier to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Use simple links such as “Also”, “For this reason”, and “As a result” to join your ideas more smoothly.
task response
You answer all the main parts of the letter: why you want to help, what work you can do, and when you are free.
task response
Your reasons are personal and clear. Your study in pharmacy gives a good reason for asking to volunteer.
coherence and cohesion
The letter is easy to follow because each main point is in its own paragraph.
coherence and cohesion
The greeting and closing are polite and right for a formal letter.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • volunteer
  • unpaid work
  • free time
  • dedication
  • healthcare
  • assist
  • patients
  • administrative tasks
  • commitment
  • flexibility
  • personal satisfaction
  • inspired
  • community service
  • contribute
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