Economic progress is considered a significant factor to measure a country's success. But many people think that other factors should be considered when measuring the success of a country. What other factors do you think measure a country's success? Among these, is one more important than the others?

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Introduction

While

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economic development is one of the significant indicators, there are other elements that influence a

country

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's success, including

healthcare

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and

education

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quality, employment rates, and

corruption

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level

Fix the agreement mistake

levels

show examples

. Among these factors, I believe

low

Correct article usage

the low

show examples

level

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corruption

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may be the most crucial determinant, as it portrays how the government formulates public and economic

policies

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in order to develop the

nation

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Body paragraph 1

On the one hand, there are numerous elements contributing to the advancement of a

country

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To begin

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with, economic achievements are usually the standard because it provides credible data through gross domestic product, that counted annually. The higher the number, the bigger the success.

In addition

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, the high quality of

healthcare

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systems and

education

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also

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indicates a successful

country

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. In many developed countries, the citizen can get free and high facility of

healthcare

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and

education

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that the government provides.

For example

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, in Finland, it is well known that they provide free access to study for all levels from preschool to university, dedicated to

the

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apply

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society.

As a result

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people

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can have a good degree,

then

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get a high-paid job and build a prosperous life.

Furthermore

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, a low

level

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of unemployment

also

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serves as an indicator that a society in a

nation

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is able to fulfil its basic needs, like food and clothes.

Body paragraph 2

On the other hand

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, the

corruption

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level

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is the most important factor, because it shows how

policies

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in public and economic sectors are being formulated to develop the

nation

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. If

people

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in power use their authority in the wrong way, it can destroy the

country

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through bad

policies

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which not side with the

people

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, but only to gratify certain parties.

For example

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, as the

corruption

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level

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is high in Indonesia, the government fail to provide good and fair

education

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quality. In many remote areas, we can find broken school buildings and very low salary rates for the teachers, as the schools do not get enough money to hold a proper learning process.

Besides

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, the

healthcare

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system is

also

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suffering a similar situation.

Therefore

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, when the

corruption

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rate is high, it affects

people

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's lives significantly as they can not get

good

Correct article usage

a good

show examples

education

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and

healthcare

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Conclusion

In conclusion, among the factors that influence a

country

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's success, I think the

level

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corruption

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is the most crucial determinant. The high

corruption

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leads to tons of bad

policies

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that ruin the

nation

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itself.

mimumimu

Sep 19, 2026

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task response

Answer all parts of the question more directly. You name health, education, jobs, and corruption, but explain more clearly why each one shows a country is doing well.

task response

Your main view is clear: low corruption is the key factor. Make the link stronger by showing how less corruption can improve health, schools, jobs, and the economy.

task response

Use examples with care. The Finland example helps, but the point about free study should be stated in a more exact way. The Indonesia example would be stronger if it gave one clear, well-known fact or a less broad claim.

coherence and cohesion

The essay has a clear start, two main body parts, and an end. However, the first body part repeats the role of economic growth even though the question asks mainly for other measures of success. Give more space to health, education, safety, and jobs.

coherence and cohesion

Keep each paragraph focused on one main idea. In the first body part, move from health and education to jobs with a clearer link, so the reader can follow your line of thought.

coherence and cohesion

Use linking words more naturally. Phrases such as “On the one hand” and “On the other hand” suggest two opposite views, but your essay mostly gives one view. Try “First,” “Also,” and “Most importantly” instead.

coherence and cohesion

Make some sentences clearer and more exact. For example, write “GDP is measured each year” rather than “GDP, that counted annually,” and write “policies that do not support people” rather than “policies which not side with the people.”

task response

You give a clear answer to the final question and keep this view from the start to the end.

task response

You choose useful measures of success, such as health care, education, jobs, and corruption.

coherence and cohesion

Your ideas are set out in a clear order: other measures first, then the factor you see as most important, followed by a short ending.

coherence and cohesion

Examples are used to support your points, and the final paragraph clearly restates your main view.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
8
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

390 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

quality of life
life expectancy
public healthcare
access to medical treatment
high-quality education
literacy rate
equal opportunities
income inequality
social mobility
public safety
low crime rate
rule of law
political stability
corruption levels
environmental protection
clean air and water
citizen well-being
life satisfaction
sustainable development
fair distribution of wealth

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