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Writing Samples
Band 7

Modern communications technology benefits some people, but some don't benefit at all. Do you agree or disagree?

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Some argue that benefits from modern
communication
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 technologies are not shared equally and that certain groups gain little or nothing from these developments. I partly disagree with
this
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 view because,
although
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 the degree of
benefit
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 varies significantly, it is difficult to argue that any group is entirely excluded from the advantages of modern
communication
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 tools. On the one hand, it is true that some individuals and communities
benefit
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 more than others.
People
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 in urban areas with strong digital infrastructure,
for example
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, can fully utilise high-speed internet, online banking, and remote working opportunities.
In contrast
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, those in rural regions or developing countries may face limited access
due to
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 poor connectivity or a lack of digital literacy.
Similarly
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, older generations who are less familiar with technology may not use smartphones or social media as effectively as younger users, which reduces the practical advantages they gain. These disparities suggest that the benefits of
communication
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 technology are not distributed evenly.
On the other hand
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, it would be inaccurate to claim that some
people
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 receive no
benefit
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 at all. Individuals with minimal digital skills still experience indirect advantages.
For instance
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, public services, banks, and healthcare providers increasingly rely on digital
communication
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 systems, meaning even basic users
benefit
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 from faster information exchange and improved accessibility.
Moreover
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, mobile phones, even in their simplest form, allow
people
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 to stay connected with family members, access emergency services, and receive important updates. These functions demonstrate that modern
communication
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 technology has become deeply embedded in everyday life, leaving very few
people
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 entirely untouched by its benefits. In conclusion,
while
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it is clear that
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 modern
communication
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 technologies
benefit
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 some groups more than others, I disagree with the idea that certain
people
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 do not
benefit
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 at all. The extent of advantage may differ depending on access and ability, but virtually everyone gains some value from these technologies in daily life.

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task response
Make your main view even more clear in the first part. Say very early that you partly disagree, and keep this line strong in all body parts.
task response
Add one more very clear real example for people who get less help, such as very old people or very poor villages. This would make your answer stronger.
task response
Your ideas are clear, but you can explain one point a little more. For example, say exactly how poor internet stops people from getting full value.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay is easy to follow. To make it even better, use a few linking words inside paragraphs to show cause and result more clearly.
coherence and cohesion
The two body parts are balanced well, but you could make the contrast between them a little sharper with a short topic sentence.
coherence and cohesion
Keep each paragraph focused on one main idea, as you do here. In future, you can also add one short closing line in each body paragraph to tie the idea back to your view.
task response
You answer the question fully and give a clear opinion.
task response
Your main ideas are relevant and easy to understand.
task response
You use good examples like rural areas, older people, banks, and healthcare.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction, two body parts, and a strong conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
The order of ideas is logical and easy to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Linking between sentences and paragraphs works well most of the time.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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