Smoking not only harms the smoker, but also those who are nearby. Therefore, smoking should be bend in public place. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

5.0 / 9

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Introduction

As smoking not only gives rise to

healthy

Replace the word

health

problems

Change preposition

for

show examples

smokers but

also

Linking Words

who

Correct pronoun usage

those who

show examples

are surrounded, some

people

Use synonyms

calim

Correct your spelling

claim

that it should be banned in public

area

Check wording

areas

show examples

This

Linking Words

essay will examine both the opinions and explain why I cannot agree more with these statements.

Body paragraph 1

It is no gainsaying that

smoke

Use synonyms

bring

Correct subject-verb agreement

brings

show examples

unimaginable risks to

people

Use synonyms

's health.

Smoke

Use synonyms

of cigarette is full of varying kinds of elements that will take a heavy toll on

human's

Check wording

human

show examples

health. Take Nogotine as

example

Correct article usage

an example

show examples

, which will cause permanent damage to the function of lung. Based on a related survey conducted by the University of British Columbia in 2020,

due to

Linking Words

the long-term

expoture

Correct your spelling

exposure

to the

smoke

Use synonyms

people

Use synonyms

are more likely to have breath-related problems and even cancer.

This

Linking Words

will not only influence the

people

Use synonyms

who

smoke

Use synonyms

, but

also

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

nearby may have to suffer from the second-hand

smoke

Use synonyms

and get sick.

Besides

Linking Words

cigarette

Check wording

cigarettes

show examples

may get

people

Use synonyms

addicted.

In consider of

Change preposition

Considering

show examples

its

expensive

Correct word choice

high

show examples

price, it will thereby add up to the financial burden on some

people

Use synonyms

and their families.

Body paragraph 2

Some

people

Use synonyms

maintain that the

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

of smoking should be banned in public

area

Check wording

areas

show examples

in an attempt to protect others. As we all know, a public area is usually flooded

Change preposition

with

show examples

diverse groups of

people

Use synonyms

, and some of them may be more sensitive to the smell and more easily

Wrong verb form

apply

show examples

get sick.

For instance

Linking Words

, the

smoke

Use synonyms

may aggravate the chronic diseases and some

base

Replace the word

underlying

diseases of

elderly

Correct article usage

the elderly

show examples

and

defers

Correct subject-verb agreement

delay

show examples

the physical development of babies when their mothers are pregnant. What is more,

this

Linking Words

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

may attract the attention of children and cause a severe

immitation

Correct your spelling

imitation

, as children have not fully developed their

dudgement

Correct your spelling

judgment

and persistence to

such

Linking Words

behaviors

Change the spelling

behaviours

show examples

. For those reasons, I am in favour of the ban of sigarette in public

zone

Check wording

zones

show examples

Conclusion

In conclusion, smoking will defenitely brings harms to smokers and

people

Use synonyms

nearby at the same time. I totally agree with

this

Linking Words

assertion and believe that only cigarette is better controlled in public, the safety of

public

Correct article usage

the public

show examples

can be better guaranteed.

yikeli2008

Sep 20, 2026

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response

You give a clear view: smoking should not be allowed in public places. However, the task asks for both views. You explain why smoking is harmful, but you do not fully explain the other view, such as why some people think smokers should be free to smoke in some public outdoor places.

task response

Make your main idea more exact. Say that smoking should be banned in shared indoor places and near children, but smoking areas may be made in some outdoor places. This would help you discuss both sides in a fair way.

task response

Your health ideas are useful, but some facts are not fully right. Nicotine mainly causes addiction; it is not the main cause of lung damage. Use safer wording, such as: 'Cigarette smoke can cause serious lung and heart problems.'

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has a clear start, two main parts, and an ending. To make the order stronger, let the first body part explain the view against public smoking, and let the second body part explain the view in support of smokers' freedom before giving your own view.

coherence and cohesion

Some links between ideas are good, such as 'Besides', 'For instance', and 'In conclusion'. Use fewer repeated phrases like 'people nearby' and 'public area'. You can also use 'non-smokers', 'shared places', and 'the public'.

coherence and cohesion

Keep each paragraph focused on one main point. The first body paragraph moves from health harm to addiction and family cost. This is still related, but it would be clearer to put the money point in a separate paragraph or leave it out.

coherence and cohesion

Check word forms and common phrases, because they can make your meaning less clear. For example, write 'health problems', 'claim', 'banned', 'public places', 'second-hand smoke', and 'people are more likely to have breathing problems'.

task response

You answer the main topic and give a strong, clear opinion from the start to the end.

task response

You use relevant ideas about second-hand smoke, children, older people, and pregnant women. These ideas fit the topic well.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has clear paragraphs, and the ending repeats your main view in a direct way.

coherence and cohesion

You use examples to support your points, including a study and groups who may be more at risk.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
25
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

336 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

smoking
harm
health
disease
cancer
heart
secondhand smoke
choice
ban
public place
non-smoker
protect
environment
sick
important

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Smoking not only harms the smoker, but also those who are nearby. Therefore, smoking should be bend in public place. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some parents and teachers think that children’s behavior should be strictly controlled. While some think that children should be free to behave. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people say that the government should spend more money taking care of elderly people while others think that government spending should be spent more on the education of young people. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Instead of training a few athletes to win medals at the Olympics, governments should spend the money on programmes encouraging the public to be active and stay healthy. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.