IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

the working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. do you agree or disagree. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience.

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The statement that, the working week should be shorter and
weekends
Use synonyms
 should be longer, has been one of the most disputed arguments in the modern era. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will tackle
this
Linking Words
 statement and give my personal opinion if I agree or disagree.  On the one hand,
people
Use synonyms
 agree that the weekend should be longer for multiple reasons. One is, that workers should have
time
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 to rest
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because some workers work for extended periods of
time
Use synonyms
. A good example of
this
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 is,that I once had a friend who had a job in a catering business, he used to always complain that he wished he had more
time
Use synonyms
 to rest because his employer used to ask so much from him.
In addition
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, longer
weekends
Use synonyms
 mean the person gets to spend more
time
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 with their family. The perfect example of
this
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 is,that I used to not have a job, so every day was a weekend for me, I used to spend some quality
time
Use synonyms
 and was very comfortable with my family. 
On the other hand
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,
People
Use synonyms
 say that extended
weekends
Use synonyms
 aren't very good for multiple reasons. A good reason is, that longer
weekends
Use synonyms
 might make an employee lazy. A very good example of
this
Linking Words
 is, that if someone stays home for extended periods of
time
Use synonyms
, they will be very lazy to complete any simple task, to add more to that, when I was not working and had plenty of
time
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 at home, I was very lazy and had no motivation to complete anything.
In addition
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, longer
weekends
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 mean less pay, of course working less means you'll be paid less, you can't expect the same salary for doing less work, and some
people
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 can't afford to get paid less because many
people
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 including their families depend on their pay. In conclusion, I disagree that the working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend
,
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apply
show examples
 because extended
weekends
Use synonyms
 have more downsides than upsides.

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coherence cohesion
Consider varying your sentence structures to create a more engaging and dynamic writing style.
task achievement
Try to elaborate further on your points, providing more nuance and depth to your arguments.
task achievement
You provided relevant examples from your own experience, which helps to illustrate your points effectively.
coherence cohesion
Your essay follows a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
coherence cohesion
You showed a balanced perspective by discussing both sides of the argument before concluding with your own opinion.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • productivity
  • burnout
  • motivation
  • mental well-being
  • work-life balance
  • job satisfaction
  • pollution levels
  • traffic congestion
  • consumer spending
  • economic implications
  • leisure and service sectors
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