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Writing Samples
Band 2.5

It is important for everyone, including young people, to save money for their future. ​To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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Introduction
Opinions diverge about the necessity of saving money for youngsters. Some think that it is very vital, and
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then
Correct determiner usage
the
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 opposite is true for others. In
this
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essay
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essay,
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 I will
endeaour
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endeavour to make
 both points with giving specific examples before coming to a reasonable conclusion.
Body paragraph 1
​First of all, I believe that saving money is not essential for
children
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children's
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future
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. One of the main
reason
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reasons
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 is that the
youngs
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young
 can not be independent. If parents create their
future
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 and provide them with money for a lifetime, I think
,
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apply
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 they should try a lot in order to live in a better
future
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.
Secondly
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, it creates competition among parents. They want to get
in
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into
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huge finance rather than others.
However
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, there is no denying
fact
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the fact
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 that
,
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apply
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 there are some parents
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who
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gather financial support for their children. Because they don't want to risk. If their child faces some difficulties in the
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future
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future,
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 what
they can
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can they
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 do
.
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?
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 The majority of individuals believe that their child will spend that finance for study or travel. In one word, they will spend it
for
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on
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 a better
future
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, no matter what happened.
Conclusion
​In conclusion, I believe that it creates the feeling of laziness in every child.
However
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, every human should choose what fits best
on
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for
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 them.

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task response
Make your main view clear in the first part. Say if you agree, disagree, or agree in part. Your essay starts with both views, but your own view is not clear until later.
task response
Answer the full question. The question is about everyone, including young people. Your ideas talk mostly about children and parents, so also write about young adults and why saving may help them.
task response
Give clear reasons for each main point. For example, saving can help a young person pay for study, travel, a home, or a hard time. If you disagree, explain why using money now may be more useful.
task response
Use one short, real example for each main idea. For example: “A student who saves part of a part-time job can pay for a course later.” This makes your point easier to understand.
coherence and cohesion
Use a simple plan: first part with your view, one body part for the first reason, one body part for the second reason, and a final part that repeats your view.
coherence and cohesion
Keep one main idea in each body part. The first body part moves from children not being free to parents paying for life, but the link is not clear. Explain how each idea supports your view.
coherence and cohesion
Use clear link words such as “First”, “Also”, “However”, “For example”, and “Therefore”. Do not use “Secondly” when the first point is not fully finished.
coherence and cohesion
Make the final part match your main view. You say saving can make children lazy, but this idea is not fully explained in the body. Add support for it or choose a final view that follows your earlier points.
task response
You try to show both sides of the topic before giving your final view. This is a good start for a discussion essay.
task response
You include ideas about study, travel, and help in a hard time. These are useful areas to develop.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a beginning, body parts, and a final part. This gives the reader a basic path through your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
You use some linking words, such as “First of all”, “Secondly”, “However”, and “In conclusion”.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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