Young offenders should receive the same punishments as adults. Do you agree or disagree?

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Introduction

There is an argument that young criminals deserve to receive the same punishments as adults when they commit crimes. In my opinion, I believe that some serious crimes should receive suitable consequences; meanwhile, some less serious

offenders

Use synonyms

could have a second chance to compensate for their misconduct.

Body paragraph 1

On the one hand, young criminals should receive punishment

according to

Linking Words

the severity of their

offenses

Change the spelling

offences

show examples

. Simply put, there are some crimes that are too severe and dangerous to society

that

Correct word choice

, and

show examples

offenders

Use synonyms

should be condemned under the same legal framework.

As a result

Linking Words

, it could help deter criminals among teenagers.

For example

Linking Words

, in 2010 in Vietnam, a teenager named Le Van Luyen was sent to prison for 18 consecutive years after killing a family of four, and his story helped deter teenagers at that time from committing

crime

Correct article usage

a crime

show examples

Body paragraph 2

On the other hand

Linking Words

, I strongly agree that some young

offenders

Use synonyms

deserve an opportunity to fully understand the consequences of their wrongdoing and become a better version of themselves. Most teenagers are still immature and impulsive, so they can not determine which actions are illegal.

Therefore

Linking Words

instead

Linking Words

of simply sending them to prison, the government should apply appropriate deterrent measures and provide juvenile

offenders

Use synonyms

with educational programmes to raise their awareness of misconduct

as well as

Linking Words

prevent reoffending behaviour.

For example

Linking Words

, the punishment for a young robber could be one year of community service and attend juvenile correctional facility. These would help them

recognize

Change the spelling

recognise

show examples

their faults and become helpful citizens

for

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show examples

society.

Conclusion

In conclusion,

while

Linking Words

I believe that juveniles should be judged the same as adults if they commit felonies, I suppose young people who only participate in minor misconduct should receive

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

punishment based on the severity of their

action

Fix the agreement mistake

actions

show examples

and age.

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Sep 25, 2026

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task response

Make your main view more direct in the first paragraph. You partly agree, but the essay also says young people should be judged the same as adults for serious crimes. Say clearly that they should not get the same punishment in every case; age, crime, and risk should all matter.

task response

Explain why the same legal rule is right for very serious crime, not only that it may stop other teenagers. You could add that the harm to victims is very great and that the public needs to be safe.

task response

Develop the second main point with a clearer plan. Explain how school, care, or work in the community can help a young person change, and why prison may not be the best first step for small crimes.

task response

Use examples more carefully. The Vietnam case supports the point about serious crime, but it needs a clearer link to your view on adult punishment. The robber example should use a complete form, such as 'one year of community service and time in a youth centre.'

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has a clear four-part shape: introduction, two main paragraphs, and conclusion. Keep this structure, but make the link between each paragraph and your main view even clearer.

coherence and cohesion

Some sentences are hard to follow because the subject is not clear. For example, change 'there are some crimes that are too severe and dangerous to society that offenders should be condemned' to 'when a young person commits a very serious crime, the court may need to use a strong punishment.'

coherence and cohesion

Use linking words in a more exact way. 'As a result' does not fit well before the point about stopping crime. Try 'This may help to stop other teenagers from doing the same thing.'

coherence and cohesion

Keep key words the same where possible. You use 'young criminals', 'young offenders', 'juveniles', and 'teenagers'. This is not wrong, but using 'young offenders' most of the time will make the essay easier to follow.

task response

You answer both sides of the issue and give a clear reason for stronger action in very serious cases and a second chance in small cases.

task response

Your ideas are relevant, especially the focus on the seriousness of the crime, the age of the person, and the chance to change.

coherence and cohesion

The main paragraphs each have one clear topic, and the conclusion returns to the main contrast between serious and minor crime.

coherence and cohesion

You use useful signposts such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', 'For example', and 'In conclusion' to guide the reader.

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

288 words

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Young offenders should receive the same punishments as adults. Do you agree or disagree?

Should a city try to preserve its old, historic buildings or destroy them and replace them with modern buildings? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

In many cities around the world polution levels have been risen in recent years. Why are some cities becoming more polluted? What effects does this have?

Some people think that it is the responsibility of governments to take care of the environment, while others believe that it is the responsibility of the citizens. Discuss both views and give your opinion.