IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 1

Reading books keeps a person’s mind active, whereas watching films and television is passive and does not require a person to use their imagination. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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It is commonly believed that reading books
maintain
Correct subject-verb agreement
maintains
show examples
 a
reader
Use synonyms
's mind
triggered
Verb problem
apply
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,
while
Linking Words
 films and watching television
does
Correct subject-verb agreement
do
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 not
simulate
Verb problem
stimulate
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 the brain to be creative. To some
extend
Use the right word
extent
show examples
 I agree with
this
Linking Words
 idea because a person needs to see and
visualize
Change the spelling
visualise
show examples
 as well. First of all, I would like to talk about reading books
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 allows people to reflect on ideas and to interpret the writer's message.
While
Linking Words
 reading the
steer
Use the right word
text
show examples
 in the hands
if
Use the right word
of
show examples
 the
reader
Use synonyms
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 it is the
reader
Use synonyms
 who interprets the received message the way he/she wants. Mostly, the background of the
reader
Use synonyms
 plays a big role in the interpretation of the text

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task response
Your view is clear: you partly agree because books ask people to make pictures in their mind. However, the answer stops too soon. Add a full body part about films and TV, explain when they can also make people think, and end with a short final view.
task response
Develop each main point with a reason and an example. For example, say how a reader may picture a place or a person in a book, but a film gives many of these pictures to the viewer.
task response
Answer the whole question by saying how far you agree. At the moment, you only discuss books, so the other side of the question is not fully covered.
coherence and cohesion
The first body paragraph has one clear main idea, but some lines are hard to follow. Make the order simple: main idea, explanation, example, then link back to the question.
coherence and cohesion
Use clear linking words to show contrast, such as “However”, “For example”, “As a result”, and “On the other hand”. This will help the reader follow your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Avoid very long sentences with many ideas. For example, split the sentence about the reader and the writer’s message into two or three short sentences.
coherence and cohesion
Check unclear phrases. “The steer in the hands” does not show your meaning. You may mean: “The story is in the reader’s hands.”
task response
You state your position in the introduction and give a main reason for it.
task response
Your point about readers making their own pictures and meaning is relevant to the question.
coherence and cohesion
You use a clear opening phrase and begin the body with a main topic about reading books.
coherence and cohesion
The link between a reader’s past life and the meaning they take from a text is a useful idea.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • mental stimulation
  • active engagement
  • use one’s imagination
  • form mental images
  • interpret a message
  • critical-thinking skills
  • reading comprehension
  • sustained concentration
  • reflect on ideas
  • visual storytelling
  • thought-provoking content
  • analyse the plot
  • predict the outcome
  • different perspectives
  • educational documentaries
  • light entertainment
  • intellectually engaging
  • develop cognitive skills
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