IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Millions of dollars are spent on spce research every year. Some people argue that the money should be spent on improving living standard on Earth. Do you agree or disagree?

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Introduction
The
resent
Use the right word
recent
show examples
 argument of whether fundings of space research should be positioned towards improving living quality on
earth
Capitalize the proper name
Earth
show examples
.
and
Capitalize the word
And
show examples
 I disagree with
this
Linking Words
 statement
entirly
Correct your spelling
entirely
 for the
soul
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sole
show examples
 reason that if
fundings
Check wording
funding
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 should be cut, it can be cut from
reasearch
Correct your spelling
research
 on
distructive
Correct your spelling
destructive
 war weapons
not
Punctuation problem
, not
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scinece related
Correct your spelling
science-related
 fields .
Body paragraph 1
Governments fund many things, some are more important
Linking Words
then
Use the right word
than
show examples
 others, and cutting funds of space releated research that actually benefits us
human
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humans
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 and gives us a better understanding of the universe we live in,
instead
Linking Words
 of cutting funds towards mass
distruction
Correct your spelling
destruction
 weapons that could in no way help humanity
but
Punctuation problem
, but
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 it does the complete
oppisite
Correct your spelling
opposite
.
That is
Linking Words
were
Use the right word
where
show examples
 funds must be cut and given to the people to improve their
Use synonyms
day to
Correct your spelling
day-to-day
day
Use synonyms
 life.
Body paragraph 2
To improve living conditions on earth, it is crucial to understand how
valiable
Correct your spelling
valuable
 space
researchs
Replace the word
research
 and any other
acadamic
Correct your spelling
academic
 studies are . denying it and only
foucsing
Correct your spelling
focusing
 on the bare
neseccities
Correct your spelling
necessities
 can only result in a world with no
knowlege
Correct your spelling
knowledge
and nothing will ever evolve. Many
neglecte
Correct your spelling
neglect
 the fact that a lot of the things that improve living conditions actually were a part of a science study one
day
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. No one can ever predict how the outcome of these studies can manafist into our daily lives one
day
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 and how it will improve
it
Fix the agreement mistake
them
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.
Conclusion
in
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In
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 conclusion, it will forever be
neseccary
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necessary
 to fund all kinds of science research. Even though many will think it is a waste of money
but
Correct word choice
,
show examples
 in
reality
Punctuation problem
reality,
show examples
 it
contibutes
Correct your spelling
contributes
 to our daily life even if they are unaware of it. And the true waste of money is funding
reasearchs releated
Correct your spelling
research related
 to weapons used for wars.

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task response
Your view is clear: you do not agree that space money should be moved to life on Earth. However, answer the main point more fully. Explain how space work can help people on Earth, such as weather reports, maps, or new ways to talk over long distance.
task response
Your main idea about war weapons is relevant, but it takes too much space. The question asks about space work and living standards. Keep the focus on this link in each body part.
task response
Give one or two clear, real examples. For example, say that space systems can warn people about storms, help farmers plan crops, and help rescue teams find people after a flood.
coherence and cohesion
Use a simple plan: first say your view; then give one reason space work helps life on Earth; next give a second reason; then end by restating your view.
coherence and cohesion
Some sentences are very long and hold many ideas. Make them shorter. This will make your meaning easier to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Use clear link words, but do not repeat them too much: 'First', 'Also', 'For example', 'As a result', and 'In conclusion' can help the reader follow your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Make each paragraph start with one clear main idea. Then add an explanation and an example before moving to the next point.
task response
You state your opinion at the start and keep the same view through the whole essay.
task response
You make a useful point that science can lead to things that improve daily life.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has an opening, body paragraphs, and a clear ending.
coherence and cohesion
Your last paragraph returns to your main view and brings the essay to a close.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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