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Writing Samples
Band 6

Many people believe that it is easier to have a healthy lifestyle in the countryside. Others believe that there are healthy benefits of living in cities. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

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Introduction
Some individuals argue that leading a healthy
lifestyle
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 is simpler in rural areas,
while
Linking Words
 others claim that living in modern
cities
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 is better for
people
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’s health. In my opinion, it depends on the person’s self-determination. As long as
people
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 eat a balanced diet
,
Correct word choice
and
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 exercise regularly , their health can remain in good condition regardless of where they live.
Body paragraph 1
Life in the countryside may contribute to a healthier
lifestyle
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due to
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 cleaner air and fresh, locally produced
food
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. Lower levels of traffic reduce air pollution, allowing
people
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 to breathe cleaner and potentially reducing the strain on their lungs. Without the constant noise of traffic,
people
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 may feel less irritated, which could have a positive effect on their mental well-being.
In addition
Linking Words
, home-grown
food
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 may contain fewer harmful chemical treatments than natural farming methods, allowing locals to consume the original fresh products.
Moreover
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, home-grown produce can encourage healthy eating habits,
while
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 agricultural work can promote
exercise regularly
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regular exercise
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.
Body paragraph 2
However
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, many believe that living in
cities
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 gives more opportunities to maintain a healthy
lifestyle
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.
Cities
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 offer convenient access to healthcare services, sports facilities and
food
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 options for the population with special dietary requirements.
Additionally
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, residents of
cities
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 can receive quicker medical care at any time
due to
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 the greater number of hospitals. Sports facilities are more developed in
cities
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 because of the numerous fitness centres and gyms that are available to residents. The accessibility of fitness facilities can motivate
people
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 to incorporate physical activities into their daily lives. Urban supermarkets have an available access to a wide range of
food
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 for
people
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 with dietary needs,
such
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 as sugar-free alternatives and gluten-free pastry.
Consequently
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, residents have more options to choose suitable ways of maintaining their physical well-being, eating habits and healthcare.
Conclusion
In conclusion, rural areas may offer environmental benefits for maintaining a healthy
lifestyle
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,
such
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 as cleaner air and fresh
food
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,
while
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 urban
cities
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 provide better access to healthcare, gyms and a variety of
food
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 options. I believe that both rural and urban areas offer benefits , and individuals can support their healthy
lifestyle
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 in either environment.

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task response
You discuss both sides and give your own view. To make your view stronger, say more clearly why personal choice is more important than place.
task response
Some points need more care. For example, home-grown food is not always safer, and city food is not always healthy. Add a short reason or real-life example for each point.
task response
Your ideas about country life are clear: clean air, less noise, fresh food, and farm work. Your city ideas are also clear: hospitals, gyms, and food for special needs.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear order: opening, country view, city view, and ending. This makes it easy to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Use links in a more natural way. You use 'In addition', 'Moreover', and 'Additionally' well, but some long sentences can be split into two shorter ones.
coherence and cohesion
Keep each paragraph focused on one main idea. In the country paragraph, group air and noise together, then discuss food and work. This will make the flow smoother.
coherence and cohesion
Avoid repeating 'healthy lifestyle' too often. You can sometimes use 'good health', 'health', or 'a healthy life' instead.
task response
You answer every part of the question and give a fair view of both country and city life.
task response
The examples of hospitals, gyms, and food for people with special needs are useful and fit the topic well.
coherence and cohesion
Each body paragraph has a clear main focus, and the ending sums up both views and your opinion.
coherence and cohesion
Words such as 'However' and 'Consequently' help show the change between ideas clearly.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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