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Band 4

Some people believe that we cannot learn anything from the past for our life today, while others believe that history is a valuable source of information to understand Humans life. Discuss both views and give your opinio

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Introduction
It is argued
weather
Use the right word
whether
show examples
history
Use synonyms
 is
pivotal
Add an article
a pivotal
show examples
 source of information to
compehend
Correct your spelling
comprehend
life
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 or useless information that could impact
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
our
Use synonyms
life
Check wording
lives
show examples
. Even though past experiences can not be repeated again in the present day, I believe that
past
Add an article
the past
show examples
era
Use synonyms
 is
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
highly
benefical
Correct your spelling
beneficial
 not
soley
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only
 for our
life
Use synonyms
 but for innovation as well. I quibble
from
Change preposition
with
show examples
 them and propound that we cannot compredends alot form
history
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 essay will
further
Linking Words
 elaborate
which
Change preposition
on the
show examples
 reasons which will lead to
logical
Add an article
a logical
show examples
 conclusion.
Body paragraph 1
The top-notch concrete reason, the past has not
controversed
Correct your spelling
contradicted
 our
life
Use synonyms
. It is frequently helping in our new
technologie
Correct your spelling
technology
. The
raremost
Replace the word
rarest
 coherent factor to be considered
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 cannot be
neglected
Punctuation problem
neglected,
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 is
in
Correct word choice
that in
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 the past
time
Punctuation problem
,
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 people
recherched
Correct your spelling
researched
 about small flying vehicle which
given
Wrong verb form
gave
show examples
 the articulate ideas about
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plane
Check wording
planes
show examples
 to the
scientist
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scientists
show examples
. To illustrate,
mid-1970s
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the mid-1970s
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plane
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 idea had been invented
Linking Words
moreover
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; moreover
show examples
, scientist were greatly discovered about
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plane
Check wording
planes
show examples
. After
innovation
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the innovation
show examples
plane
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has been
Wrong verb form
was
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 discovered in
mid-1980s
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the mid-1980s
show examples
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 was possibly
happened
Verb problem
caused
show examples
 by past
history
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.
Body paragraph 2
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
In
Fix capitalization
in
show examples
 the
era
Use synonyms
 of advanced technology,
history
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 is
continously
Correct your spelling
continuously
 decreasing the demand in humans
life
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.
Technolgy
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Technology
 creates more valuable
source
Check wording
sources
show examples
 which
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 highly essentiel
then
Linking Words
 past
era
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as maths, science , chemistry and artificelle intelligent
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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 provides to individual specific logic to solve
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
problems in personal and professional
life
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. It will be helping them not
in
Correct word choice
only in
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 schooling
Linking Words
along with
Correct word choice
but also in
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 higher education.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
history
Use synonyms
 could
be
Verb problem
apply
show examples
frequently
creating
Wrong verb form
create
show examples
 confusion
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
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 as in the periodical
era
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 solidiers did fight to
revenage
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avenge
 from
another
Correct determiner usage
other
show examples
 countries
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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 ultimately
give
Correct subject-verb agreement
gives
show examples
 us
opinion
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the opinion
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 fight is
main
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the main
show examples
 source to win in
life
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.
For example
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,
now days
Correct your spelling
nowadays
 people are
learing
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learning
 about
social-norms
Correct your spelling
social norms
, kindness and
politness
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politeness
 rather
Linking Words
then
Use the right word
than
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 wars ,
social-distance
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social distance
.
Conclusion
In conclusion, personal choice can encourage self-expression
,
Punctuation problem
.
show examples
 I firmly believe
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
history
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offer
Correct subject-verb agreement
offers
show examples
 greater benefits by giving previous clearance and creating a more focused learning environment.
History
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 should still
allow
Wrong verb form
be allowed
show examples
 but in limited
through
Check wording
form through
show examples
 occasional.

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task response
Answer both views in a clear way. Explain why some people think history is not useful, then explain why others think it is useful. State your own view clearly and keep it the same from start to end.
task response
Your main view is not clear. The first part says history helps new ideas, but the next part says history is less useful. Choose one clear view: for example, history is useful because it helps us learn from old mistakes and past ideas.
task response
Use real and clear examples. The example about planes is hard to understand and the dates do not help. You could write: “Past work on flight helped later people build safer planes.”
task response
Do not add ideas that do not fit the question. The last line about personal choice and self-expression is not about history. Make every sentence answer the question.
coherence and cohesion
Use a simple four-part plan: introduction, one paragraph for the first view, one paragraph for the second view and your view, then a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Make each paragraph have one main idea. Start with a clear first sentence, explain it, then give one example. This will make your writing easier to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Use clear links between ideas, such as “On the one hand”, “For example”, “However”, “As a result”, and “In conclusion”. Do not use long or unclear link words.
coherence and cohesion
Check that the conclusion matches your opinion. Your conclusion says history has benefits, but also says it should be limited. Say clearly why you think this.
task response
You try to discuss both sides of the topic, and you give your own view.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction, two main parts, and a conclusion. You also use links such as “On the other hand” and “Furthermore”.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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