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Writing Samples
Band 7

Learning English at school is often viewed as more important than learning local languages. If these are not taught, many are at risk of dying out. In your opinion, is it important for everyone to learn English? Should we take steps to ensure the survival of local languages, and if so, how?

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Introduction
Studying
English
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 at school is commonly seen as a greater priority than learning native
languages
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. Without being passed on to the next generation, many
languages
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 are in danger of disappearing. In my view, everyone should learn basic
English
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 because it can help
people
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 communicate, especially in emergencies, but
people
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 should not abandon their native
languages
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.
Body paragraph 1
English
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 is spoken in more countries than any other
language
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, and
people
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 should learn it in case of emergencies or simply to communicate. Communication can save lives.
For example
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, a foreign tourist may be distracted by their phone
while
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 crossing a street as a car is approaching. If a local person shouts a warning in
English
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, the tourist can understand it immediately and avoid a horrific accident.
In addition
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, most information on the internet is in
English
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, so learning it gives
people
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 access to more knowledge.
Therefore
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, even basic
English
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 can keep
people
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 safe and give them access to a wider world of knowledge.
Body paragraph 2
On the other hand
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, native
languages
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 are as important as
English
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 because they shape a person’s identity, and
people
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 should embrace them.
However
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, more and more
people
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 are abandoning their native
language
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 without noticing it. Unless
people
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 use their native
language
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 regularly, they may forget it. To prevent
this
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, schools could teach local
languages
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 for a few hours each week, alongside
English
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. Parents
also
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 play a key role, since children who hear their native
language
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 at home every day are far more likely to keep it.
Conclusion
In conclusion, I believe basic
English
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 is a valuable skill for everyone, as it improves safety and access to knowledge.
However
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, native
languages
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 must
also
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 be protected through education and family life, so that
people
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 do not lose an important part of who they are.

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task response
Your view is clear and you answer both parts. To make it stronger, add one more clear way to save local languages, such as local TV, books, music, or town events.
task response
The safety example is clear, but it is a little narrow. Add an example of English for work, study, or travel to show why it is useful for all people.
task response
Explain more about what is lost when a local language dies. You could mention family stories, old songs, and local history.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, two main body parts, and a clear end. Each part stays on one main idea, which makes it easy to read.
coherence and cohesion
Use a few more links between ideas. For example, after the road example, you could say: “This is one way English can help in daily life.”
coherence and cohesion
The word “native language” is used many times. You can sometimes use “local language”, “home language”, or “these languages” to make the writing flow better.
task response
You give a clear answer: English is useful, but local languages should not be left behind.
task response
Your ideas are on the topic and your examples support them well. The point about school and parents gives real ways to help local languages live on.
coherence and cohesion
The order of ideas is strong: English first, local languages next, then a short end that brings both views together.
coherence and cohesion
Words such as “For example”, “In addition”, “On the other hand”, and “Therefore” help the reader follow your ideas.
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