Some people prefer to treat minor illnesses themselves with medicines bought from a pharmacy or advice found online, rather than visiting a doctor. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

8.5 / 9
✍️ Want to check your own essay?Write on this topic →
Introduction
Pharmacies now sell remedies for almost every common complaint, and the internet offers a diagnosis for every symptom typed into a search box.
This
Linking Words
essay will argue that
although
Linking Words
treating oneself saves time and eases the pressure on clinics, the risk of missing a serious condition means the disadvantages outweigh the benefits for anything beyond the most trivial ailment.
Body paragraph 1
Admittedly, self-care has real advantages. The most obvious is convenience, since a working parent with a cold can buy a remedy in five minutes rather than losing half a day in a waiting room. In Casablanca,
for instance
Linking Words
, public clinics are so crowded that a visit for a minor complaint can mean hours on a bench surrounded by people who are far sicker. Closely linked to
this
Linking Words
is the benefit to the health system itself. When citizens manage small problems at home, doctors have more time for patients who truly need them, and,
consequently
Linking Words
, waiting lists for serious conditions grow shorter.
Body paragraph 2
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, the dangers of
this
Linking Words
habit are considerable. The most serious is misdiagnosis, because many grave illnesses begin with symptoms that look harmless. A persistent headache may be stress, or it may be high blood pressure, and only an examination can tell the difference, so a person who treats the pain and ignores the cause may lose months of valuable treatment.
Moreover
Linking Words
, medicines taken without guidance can do harm of their own. Antibiotics bought over the counter,
for example
Linking Words
, are often taken for viral infections they cannot cure, and
this
Linking Words
misuse has made several common infections in Morocco resistant to drugs that once worked reliably.
Conclusion
In conclusion, treating minor ailments at home saves time for patients and relieves overburdened clinics.
However
Linking Words
, the danger of overlooking a serious illness and misusing medication is too great, and, on balance, the disadvantages outweigh the advantages for anyone whose symptoms
last
Linking Words
more than a few days.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Your answer deals with both sides and gives a clear view. To make it even stronger, say more clearly that home care is safe only for very small, short-term health problems.
task response
Your ideas are well explained with clear cause and result. You could add one short example of a safe case, such as rest and water for a mild cold, to balance the two sides.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a very clear order: opening, good points, bad points, and ending. Each paragraph stays on one main idea.
coherence and cohesion
Linking words such as 'Admittedly', 'Nevertheless', 'Moreover', and 'However' guide the reader well. Keep using links in this natural way, but do not add too many.
coherence and cohesion
The last paragraph matches the main view in the opening. This gives the whole essay a strong, complete shape.
task response
You answer the main question directly and keep the same clear view from start to finish.
task response
The examples about crowded clinics, headaches, and drug use are relevant and help make your points easy to understand.
coherence and cohesion
The opening clearly tells the reader what the essay will argue.
coherence and cohesion
Your paragraphs flow well, and each main point has a clear reason and result.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

What to do next:
Look at other essays: