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Writing Samples
Band 7

Studying with a group of students in a classroom is more beneficial than learning online at home. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Introduction
More and more
people
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 think that studying online would be more beneficial than learning in classrooms,
while
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 others may not agree with
this
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 opinion. From my perspective, I completely believe that both opinions are equally important for two reasons.
Body paragraph 1
First of all, I would argue that allowing
students
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 to learn online at home can improve the social aspect by spending more time sitting with the family. The argument is that these
students
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 will have extra time during the day, which leads to a positive impact on their time management.
This
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 method results in many
people
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 having strong relationships with their family, ultimately leading to an increase in the strength of family bonds within society. A study conducted by the Department of Social Sciences at Melbourne University in 2025 concluded that 75% of online
students
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 believed that their relationships had improved during
this
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 period.
Therefore
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, the performance of the social system will be improved
due to
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 the presence of
this
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 strategy.
Body paragraph 2
In addition
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, I am convinced that requiring learners to attend classes in person is crucial to enhancing the quality of education. What I mean is that teachers can explain easily by using their body language, allowing them to deliver the information correctly.
This
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 process will increase the number of highly educated
people
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 in the future, which in turn produces successful and outstanding
people
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 in the country.
For instance
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, a teacher in high school performs an experiment in front of their
students
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 to explain the chemical reaction.
As a result
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, the objective will be achieved if that method is taken into account.
Conclusion
In conclusion, I firmly believe that
while
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 studying in classrooms can foster educational outcomes, learning online at home is essential to improve family bonds.

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task response
State your view clearly in the first paragraph. Your essay says you completely believe both are equal, but the question asks how far you agree that classroom study is more useful. Say if you agree, disagree, or agree only in part.
task response
Keep both main ideas closely linked to the question. Family time is a possible good point for online study, but explain more clearly why it makes online learning better than classroom study.
task response
Give a fuller comparison. For example, explain that online study may save travel time, while classroom study gives direct help, group work, and quick questions.
task response
Use examples that are clear and real. The Melbourne study may sound made up because no source or detail is given. A simple personal example would be stronger.
task response
Make the final paragraph match your view. It now says both ways are important, but it does not clearly answer which one is more useful overall.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear four-part shape: start, two body paragraphs, and end. Keep this shape, but make the first paragraph give a direct answer to the question.
coherence and cohesion
Use topic sentences that show the comparison. For example: “Online learning can help some students spend more time at home, but classroom learning is usually better for study.”
coherence and cohesion
Some links between ideas are too big. In the first body paragraph, move step by step from online study, to saved travel time, to more family time, to the possible effect on family life.
coherence and cohesion
Avoid unclear or very general lines such as “the performance of the social system will be improved.” Say exactly who is helped and how.
coherence and cohesion
Use link words with care. “First of all,” “In addition,” and “In conclusion” work well, but add simple links inside paragraphs, such as “because,” “so,” “however,” and “for example.”
task response
You discuss both online learning and classroom learning, so the essay stays on the main subject.
task response
You give a classroom example about a science teacher showing a chemical reaction. This helps explain why face-to-face teaching can work well.
coherence and cohesion
The essay is easy to follow because it has an opening paragraph, two main paragraphs, and a final paragraph.
coherence and cohesion
Each body paragraph has one main idea, and you use clear basic link words to guide the reader.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Collaborative learning
  • Debate
  • Discipline
  • Engagement
  • Feedback loop
  • Peer support
  • Educational resources
  • Adaptive learning
  • Self-motivation
  • Independent study
  • Digital literacy
  • Virtual classroom
  • Accessibility
  • E-learning
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