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Band 5

In some countries, it is becoming increasingly common for people to follow a vegetarian diet. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

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Introduction
Many
people
Use synonyms
 are concerned about their health these days.
As a result
Linking Words
, they are following a vegetarian
diet
Use synonyms
, and it is becoming increasingly common for them.
Although
Linking Words
 they can maintain a healthy
diet
Use synonyms
, I firmly believe that the disadvantages outweigh the merits because it will minimise their
protein
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intake
Use synonyms
.
Body paragraph 1
The main reason
people
Use synonyms
 follow
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 vegetarian
diet
Use synonyms
 is to stay healthy. When
people
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 just eat vegetables and paneer, it helps them to digest their food
intake
Use synonyms
 so quickly. They can avoid extra carbohydrate and fat
intake
Use synonyms
 in their
body
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.
This
Linking Words
 way, they can keep their
body
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 lean and healthy.
In addition
Linking Words
, a vegetarian
diet
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 keeps the
body
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 away from obesity.
For example
Linking Words
, young
people
Use synonyms
 in Italy are always keen to maintain a healthy lifestyle by following vegetarian diets, and they look much leaner compared to other nationalities.
However
Linking Words
, I believe that
this
Linking Words
 attitude towards
diet
Use synonyms
 is not beneficial for our health, and it has a massive impact on our bodies.
Body paragraph 2
The disadvantage is that
people
Use synonyms
 will suffer severely if they do not have a chance to get
protein
Use synonyms
 in their bodies. Basically,
protein
Use synonyms
 comes from eggs and meat, and if
people
Use synonyms
 follow a vegetarian
diet
Use synonyms
,
then
Linking Words
 there is a high chance that they will neglect
protein
Use synonyms
intake
Use synonyms
. Even though
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 some
people
Use synonyms
 would argue that paneer has
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 sufficient
protein
Use synonyms
 percentage like meat,
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it is not sufficient for
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 human
body
Use synonyms
 to have.
For instance
Linking Words
, doctors always suggest that
people
Use synonyms
 ensure a substantial amount of
protein
Use synonyms
 in their
diet
Use synonyms
 so that they can keep themselves away from various diseases and stay healthy.
Therefore
Linking Words
, I am of the opinion that maintaining a
protein
Use synonyms
intake
Use synonyms
 in the
diet
Use synonyms
 is more important than following a vegetarian
diet
Use synonyms
.
Conclusion
In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
people
Use synonyms
 are following a vegetarian
diet
Use synonyms
 increasingly these days, I believe that they should maintain
protein
Use synonyms
intake
Use synonyms
 to stay healthy and keep their bodies away from diseases.
For
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 reason, a vegetarian
diet
Use synonyms
 outweighs the advantages.

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task response
State your main view more clearly in the first part: the bad points are greater than the good points. Keep this same view in every part.
task response
Develop the good side more fairly before you explain why the bad side is stronger. For example, a plant-based diet can have less fat and may help some people keep a healthy weight.
task response
Your main bad point is not fully correct. People can get protein from beans, lentils, nuts, seeds, tofu, milk, cheese, and eggs if they eat them. Explain that poor planning may lead to low protein or low iron, rather than saying all vegetarian diets lack protein.
task response
Use more exact examples. The point about young people in Italy is not explained or proved. A more useful example would show a person who eats only a small range of foods and then has low iron or low vitamin B12.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, two main parts, and an end. To make the flow better, begin each body part with a direct topic sentence that shows whether it is a good point or a bad point.
coherence and cohesion
Put ideas in a clearer order. In the first body part, explain the health good points, give one example, and then link back to the question. In the second, explain one health risk, show why it can happen, and give an example.
coherence and cohesion
Some links are not clear. For example, “However” at the end of the first body part moves to your view too soon. Save the main contrast for the next body part.
coherence and cohesion
Avoid repeating “healthy,” “protein intake,” and “vegetarian diet” too often. You can use simple changes such as “this diet,” “plant foods,” and “a planned meal plan.”
task response
You answer the question directly and make your own view clear: you believe the bad points are greater than the good points.
task response
You include both sides of the issue, with health and weight as good points and diet limits as a bad point.
coherence and cohesion
The essay is easy to follow because it has an introduction, two body parts, and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
You use linking words such as “Although,” “In addition,” “For example,” “However,” and “Therefore” to connect ideas.
Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Vegetarian diet
  • Chronic diseases
  • Carbon footprint
  • Deforestation
  • Animal welfare
  • Nutritional deficiencies
  • Balanced intake
  • Societal norms
  • Meat-dominant
  • Sustainable living
  • Plant-based proteins
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