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Writing Samples
Band 7

The table below shows information about the population of New Zealand from 2011 to 2012 by age group. Summarize the formation by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

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The table below shows information about the population of New Zealand from 2011 to 2012 by age group. Summarize the formation by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
The table below provides key information on the population of New Zealand from 2011 to 2012.
This
Linking Words
 includes five groups,
such
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 as all ages, under 15, between 15 and 39, between 40 and 64, and more than 65. The unit is shown in percentages.
Thus
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, all views have significant points.
This
Linking Words
 assay will provide key information to explore the topic.
Overall
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, the
age
Use synonyms
 from15 to 39 is the highest
group
Use synonyms
, which can make a real change.
However
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, the
age
Use synonyms
group
Use synonyms
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
 65 is the lowest
group
Use synonyms
, which can make a negative change. On the one hand, in terms of the highest ratio, 2011, the
age
Use synonyms
group
Use synonyms
 from 15 to 39 is the highest part, at almost 4.381.269,
while
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 it decreases to 4.410.284 in 2012.
However
Linking Words
, it increased to 4.410.284 in 2012 at 0.6%.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, in terms of the highest ratio, 2011, the
age
Use synonyms
from
Check wording
group
show examples
 65 is the lowest part, at almost 573.946,
while
Linking Words
 it increases to 596.903.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however, while".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 75%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words age, group with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "provides" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "information" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "ratio" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • population growth
  • age group
  • increase
  • decline
  • elderly population
  • aging population
  • working-age population
  • stable labor force
  • modest increase
  • significant change
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