IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

It is better to save money than to spend it. How far do you agree with this statement? Is saving money more important than spending in today’s world? Give reasons for your answer, and provide ideas and examples from your own experience. You should write at least 250 words.

#money #today’s #world
Saving
money
 or spending
money
 in
this
 current
economical
Replace the word
economic
show examples
 climate poses a dividing question. In
this
 essay, I agree that in
this
 modern world it is important to save
money
 for
n
Change the article
a
the
show examples
umber of reasons, namely for emergency funds and
to
Replace the word
too
show examples
 many it’s a privilege
to
Verify preposition usage
of
show examples
 spending
money
. On the one hand, spending
money
 in various ways,
such
 as going on vacations and shopping gives
people
 a certain rush of happiness
that is
 very much needed today.
People
 are overworked, exhausted and unhappy;
thus
, focusing on saving
money
 would rob them of a better tomorrow.
Moreover
, sometimes saving
money
 is not always a choice one has
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
control over,
such
 as buying food, investing in housing and spending
money
 on transportation, these are all items and situations where
m
Add an article
the
show examples
oney is needed to be spent and it does not allow room for one to save
money
 as the remaining amount from their salary might not be great.
On the other hand
, live altering situations call for a need to save
money
. In certain places, like the United States of America where healthcare is priced like a luxury, it is very crucial for
people
 to save
money
 in order to afford taking care of their health and
paying
Change the verb form
to pay
show examples
 for their prescriptions.
Conversely
, as I have mentioned above,
c
Add an article
the
show examples
ost of living has increased significantly and reached a point where
people
 are unable to afford
housing
Change the verb form
to house
show examples
 and buying a car.
Therefore
, it is important to have enough
money
 saved to survive in today’s world and to prevent economic anxiety.
In addition
, a vast majority of today’s
people
 are either in the working class or financially underprivileged;
thus
, spending
money
 is not an option for them and saving
money
 is defiantly on the top of their priority list. Overall, based on the majority of
people
’s economic standing, saving
money
 is very crucial to
ones
Change to a genitive case
one's
show examples
 survival and is a priority, as
Add the comma(s)
,
show examples
without it, it would lead
people
 to turn to loans from banks with high interest or even being on the verge of bankruptcy. I agree that it’s key to save
money
 rather than to spend it in
this
 modern world.
Submitted by thisisyasminee on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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