some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. others believe that they should be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. discuss both these views and give your own opinion

The debate regarding the curriculum choices available to university
students
is a topic of considerable contention. Some advocate for allowing
students
to pursue
subjects
of their preference,
while
others assert that educational institutions should prioritize disciplines that are deemed beneficial for future employment, particularly in
fields
such
as science and technology. In my view, both perspectives possess valid advantages and disadvantages;
however
, I firmly support the notion that
students
should have the autonomy to choose their
fields
of study based on personal interest. One significant advantage of permitting university
students
to select
subjects
they are passionate about is the positive impact on their mental and emotional well-being. When
students
study topics that resonate with their
interests
, they are more likely to engage in their studies with enthusiasm.
This
intrinsic motivation can lead to reduced stress levels and a more fulfilling academic experience.
For instance
, a friend of mine who was encouraged to pursue her
interests
in the arts reported enhanced mental
health
and a balanced lifestyle, effectively managing both her studies and personal life.
Nevertheless
, a potential drawback of
this
approach is the competitive job market;
students
must be prudent in their choice of
subjects
, as degrees in humanities or other less market-oriented
fields
may not translate easily into employment opportunities.
Conversely
, proponents of a curriculum focused predominantly on science and technology highlight the advantages of
this
approach in terms of job prospects. In today's economy, many organizations are increasingly reliant on technological advancements, making degrees in these areas highly valuable.
However
, it is essential to recognize that an exclusive focus on technical
subjects
can pose risks to
students
'
health
and well-being. Those who struggle with
subjects
like mathematics may face heightened stress and anxiety, particularly if they feel compelled to excel in areas that do not align with their strengths.
This
pressure can lead to detrimental effects on their mental and physical
health
, demonstrating that an inflexible academic framework may not be in the best interest of all
students
. I believe that offering
students
the freedom to select disciplines that ignite their passion is the most advantageous approach.
This
autonomy not only nurtures individual
interests
but
also
allows
students
to develop vital soft skills, which could be enhanced through internship programs.
Such
initiatives would enable
students
to gain practical experience and workplace competencies,
thus
enhancing their employability
while
pursuing their desired
fields
of study. In conclusion, both perspectives on the education of university
students
present their respective benefits and drawbacks.
However
, empowering
students
to choose their
subjects
fosters higher levels of engagement and
overall
health
, making it a more effective long-term strategy. It is crucial for educational institutions to strike a balance, providing
students
with opportunities to pursue their
interests
while
also
equipping them with the skills necessary to thrive in a competitive job market.
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task achievement
Provide more specific examples related to science and technology fields, as well as the job market advantages they offer.
coherence cohesion
Consider adding more linking phrases to further enhance the flow between paragraphs.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction effectively sets the stage for discussing both perspectives and clearly states your opinion.
logical structure
The essay is well-organized, with clear paragraphs addressing both viewpoints and your stance.
relevant specific examples
You provided a specific example related to personal interest in the arts, which enhances the depth of your argument.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • foster
  • engagement
  • excel
  • innovative contributions
  • diversity in research
  • well-rounded education
  • broad perspectives
  • critical thinking skills
  • mental well-being
  • burnout
  • forced academic paths
  • job-ready
  • skills shortages
  • tech-driven economy
  • employment rates
  • changing job market
  • utilitarian subjects
  • aptitudes
  • wasting talent
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