IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Everyone should become vegetarian because they do not need to eat to have a healthy diet. DO you agree or disagree.

#diet
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It is considered by some that everyone should eliminate
meat
Use synonyms
 from their
diet
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 and take up a vegetarian lifestyle. In my opinion, I completely agree that
this
Linking Words
 is one the most effective ways to ensure people are striving towards a healthier life. Studies have linked the
consumption
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 of
meat
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, specifically red
meat
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, with increased risk of heart disease, stroke and certain types of cancer.
In addition
Linking Words
, the
consumption
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 of
meat
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 has contributed to the global increase in obesity.
For example
Linking Words
, many countries in the West that show a high
consumption
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 of
meat
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also
Linking Words
 show higher
health
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 issues, which are usually related to the heart, as well as ranking among the highest obesity rates. That’s to say, cutting out
meat
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 from one’s food intake and substituting with a vegetarian
diet
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 would drastically change their physical
health
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 and quality of life.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, in low-income countries where
meat
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 is priced like a luxury, picking up vegetarianism is an affordable route to take towards eating a living
diet
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.
In other words
Linking Words
, not only does
meat
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 contribute to numerous
health
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 risks but
also
Linking Words
 very expensive.
For instance
Linking Words
, underdeveloped countries tend to focus on agriculture;
therefore
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, due to its abundance, eating a vegetarian meal will cost a family less than eating
meat
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. In simple terms, consuming a healthier, plant-based
diet
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 will help people have more disposable income where they can invest and use to better their lives in different aspects. In conclusion, to deal with the high number of
health
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 risks, namely- obesity and heart disease, it is crucial for people to be educated on the issues caused by the
consumption
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 of
meat
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 and
therefore
Linking Words
, for people to take the initiative to gravitate towards a healthier lifestyle
that is
Linking Words
 a vegetarian
diet
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by thisisyasminee on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • vegetarian
  • healthy diet
  • health benefits
  • environmental benefits
  • ethical reasons
  • challenges
  • solutions
  • nutrition
  • sustainable
  • animal welfare
  • plant-based
  • vegan
What to do next:
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