Some people believe that schools should only teach children subjects which are beneficial to their future career and therefore other subjects such as music and sports are not important. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #schools #children #subjects #future #career #music #sports

There has been an upsurge in practical knowledge in recent years. What people are more concerned is whether work-based subjects are crucial in preparing for children in the real life, rather than other courses like

music

and sports. In my opinion, I agree that children should only do courses, which are related to their

future

pursuits. There are some reasons why schools should put their emphasis on courses that assist students

to begin

their

future

career. The

first

reason is that those subjects might give learners motivation to gain higher academic achievement. Only when children’s interest

in particular

fields

are kindled

Suggestion

is kindled

can they make

arduous effort

Suggestion

arduous efforts

an arduous effort

the arduous effort

to concentrate on learning and doing exercises. By doing

this

way, not only can children improve their academic attainment, but

also

countries can have more productive and well-cultivated workers in the

future

Additionally

, the application of job-related subjects in school curriculums can orient students to follow their own particular career like science or

medical

Suggestion

medicine

, balancing competitive market in the

future

This

can be seen in Vietnam, where most of

students

Suggestion

the students

only focus on studying economics and finance, leading to a higher rate of unemployment. Apart from job-related knowledge, schools cannot shirk the responsibilities for enhancing, diversifying and consolidating the skills students can use in many life situations. Learning some subjects like

music

and sports can help children

to acquire

Suggestion

acquire

and cultivate some necessary skills that are not available in vocational subjects.

For example

, by organizing sports and other physical activities, the schools can help students enhance their team-building and leadership skills.

Furthermore

, the participation in some extra-curricular subjects like

music

and sports enable students to relieve stress. In conclusion, it appears that job-related subjects, with their benefits, are set to remain an integral part in school curriculums.

However

, schools should

also

consider the significance of extra-curricular subjects like

music

and sports as students can enjoy their life and develop skills.

Submitted by ngothenamvn on Sat Mar 30 2019

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

316 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that schools should only teach children subjects which are beneficial to their future career and therefore other subjects such as music and sports are not important. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Nowaways, more teenagers want to become famous actors or singers. Why do you think this is happening? Is this a positive or negative development?

In many workplaces, online communication is getting more common than meeting face to face. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In some countries, the average weight of people is increasing, and their level of health and fitness is decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?

Economic progress is often used to measure a country’s success. However, some people believe that other factors are more important. What other factors should also be considered when measuring a country’s success? Which one do you think is the most important?