IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people believe that governments should spend on new public buildings, such as libraries and museums, rather than renovating old buildings. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #governments #buildings #libraries #museums
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We live in
materialistic world
Suggestion
a materialistic world
the materialistic world
. In
this
 modern
era it
Accept comma addition
era, it
 is important to preserve our culture as well our historical buildings. Some people believe that it is very important to
government
 should spend more money for new construction.
However
,
other
plural of other; the people or things not already mentioned
others
 claim that
government
 should more pay on historical building. I will discuss both the view in my following paragraphs.
First
 and foremost, people should recognize that
government
 should invest their money to construct
new building
Suggestion
new buildings
a new building
,
such
 as libraries, museums and some other. Because day by day pollution is increasing and it requires more new places for the studies, refreshments and some other. To illustrate
this
 point, I would like to mention that in India
government
 should build many facilities for the public. Due to that folk live
better life
Suggestion
better lives
 compare to
past
Suggestion
the past
. As an example, Indian
government
 build new schools, public toilets,
new railway station
Suggestion
a new railway station
 and some other. So that people connect with others as well. Emphasizing on the other point of view, these are
numberous
an illegal daily lottery
numbers
numerous
 arguments in the support of the idea that maintain our
mounments
a structure erected to commemorate persons or events
monuments
moments
, buildings, museums and other is
also
 important. These are
also
 an essential part of increase the economy of any country. As we all know, ‘each and every cloud has
it’s
of a thing, of it; possessive form of "it"
its
 silver lining’. A specific example of
this
 is that India had ‘The Taj Mahal.’
which
Suggestion
Which
 one is very well. India
earn
Suggestion
earns
 handsome income from it and attracts the people whole over the world.
In essence taking
Suggestion
In essence, taking
 everything into account, I pen
down saying
Accept comma addition
down, saying
 that,
this
 is a topic which raises strong passions on both sides of
arguments
Suggestion
the arguments
.
Submitted by doson234tn on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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