Nowadays, sport is becoming a big business with high earnings for professional sportspeople and a lot of companies have involved in financially and in other ways. Is it a positive or negative development of sport?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is undeniable that sports have been becoming a profitable business in the global scale. Sportsmen and companies can expect to get a number of benefits. I firmly hold the view that
this
trend would actively promote the
development
for
Suggestion
of
the sports. Sportsmen who earn lucrative income are more likely resist
effortness
earnest and conscientious activity intended to do or accomplish something
efforts
and
dovote
Suggestion
do vote
themselves
to
Suggestion
in
the sports career. Professional sports individuals
are certainly received
Suggestion
have certainly received
certainly receive
a great amount of money because of their talents and their perseverance.
This
Suggestion
Thus
,
as a result
, can motivate athletes and sportsmen undergo all difficulties and trainings. Taking Cong Phuong as an example, who is a professional attacker of Viet Nam National Football Team always try his best in his career
eventhough
Suggestion
even though
he had injuries during
football match
Suggestion
a football match
football matches
. If athletes and sportsmen had not received a great amount of money, they would have not practised in the long term of trainings and fitness.
This
Suggestion
Thus
,
as a result
, might harm the
development
of
sports industry
Suggestion
the sports industry
The companies which take part in or invest in sports business can
also
promote the quality of
sports industry
Suggestion
the sports industry
. Some companies tend to sponsor their own favourite football team or skilled athletes as the way to get back fame. They are able to hold some extra activities for sportsmen
,
Accept space
,
hire high- quality coach, build
arena
Suggestion
an arena
or modernize the infrastructure so that sportsmen can expect to sharpen their skills.
For example
, in 2017, Vingroup- a giant group poured a great amount of money for
Viet Nam Football Federation
Suggestion
the Viet Nam Football Federation
to hire a professional coach to train the Viet Nam football team.
Therefore
, Viet Nam has become the runner-up in the Asia
Footbal
Suggestion
Football
Cup. Sportsmen can expect to experience a professional environment to devote the talents and
effortness
earnest and conscientious activity intended to do or accomplish something
efforts
to the sports’
development
. In conclusion, with the
development
of modern life, sports can expect to jump to a high level of quality if the companies get involved in.
Submitted by Thanh on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: