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Writing Samples
Band 5

New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#technologies #children #time
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It is an undeniable fact that the way children spend their leisure
time
Use synonyms
 has been altered by the onset of the digital age.
Although
Linking Words
 there are some benefits of
this
Linking Words
 trend, I would argue that the disadvantages are more significant.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, there are several advantages of using spare
time
Use synonyms
 for interacting with digital devices in children.
Firstly
Linking Words
, children would probably learn computer skills which are
supplementation
Suggestion
supplementary
 of what they need to practice more at home. It is true that
computers those
Accept comma addition
computers, those
computers these
 days
have been played
Suggestion
have been playing
 a vital role in education.
Therefore
Linking Words
, computer-related skills are necessary
to
Suggestion
for
 children in order to attain better learning outcomes.
Secondly
Linking Words
, applications
from
Suggestion
of
 new educational technologies encourage children to learn subjects more willingly. By playing with mathematical applications on
Ipad
Suggestion
the iPad
iPad
IPad
, my nephew, who is around five years old,
for example
Linking Words
, is likely to spend
significant amount
Suggestion
a significant amount
 of
time
Use synonyms
 in math-related subjects. Despite above arguments, I would argue that the drawbacks of
methods
Suggestion
the methods
 which children spend in their free
time
Use synonyms
 are more significant. One reason for
this
Linking Words
 notion is that children tend to play on their own, resulting in lacking of communication skills.
This
Linking Words
 would probably lead to the risk of autism in the future. Another problem is that the way children played in leisure
time
Use synonyms
 tend to less relate to physical activities.
For instance
Linking Words
, they often watch TV or using portable
electricial
relating to or concerned with electricity
electrical
 devices, which may give rise to eye strain. In conclusion, I believe that the disadvantages of changing the way children spend in spare
time
Use synonyms
 are more significant that the benefits
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Digital literacy
  • Cyberbullying
  • Sedentary lifestyle
  • Inappropriate content
  • Self-learning
  • Screen time
  • Social inequality
  • Enhanced communication
  • Creative expression
  • Educational resources
What to do next:
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