New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

In many parts of the world. It is not uncommon to see the way
the young
Suggestion
the younger
generation shifting from outdoor to indoor activities due to the
inteference
a policy of intervening in the affairs of other countries
interference
indifference
of high-tech advancement. While it is true that there are certain benefits regarding
this
tendency, I am convicted that the consequences overwhelming its positive aspects. One the one hand, there are several perks of using spare time for interacting with digital devices in children.
Firstly
The aid of technologies could
encourange
contribute to the progress or growth of
encourage
.
Accept space
.
children
Suggestion
Children
to learn subjects more willingly. By playing with mathematical applications on
Ipad
Suggestion
iPad
IPad
, schoolers,
for example
, is likely to spend
significant amount
Suggestion
a significant amount
of time in math-related subjects, leading to the increase in academic performance.
On the other hand
,
this
inclination exerts various detrimental impacts on teenagers. The
first
drawback would be that the under-18s can be easily engrossed in their private devices, which may distract them from studying.
As a result
, students might fall behind their study, causing the decline in academic performance. Another shortcoming would be that since children are addicted to the Internet, they would allocate more time to sit behind the screen rather than going out.
This
, thence,
deprive
Suggestion
deprives
adolescents of their opportunities to socialize, making them become more prone to passive-lifestyle diseases
such
as obesity and heart illness.
This
might profoundly affect their adulthood in the long run,. To recapitulate, albeit youngsters can obtain a host of merits from the Internet, they must avoid themselves from addicting to it.
Hence
, I concur with the notion that
this
attitude brings more downsides to teenagers’ well-being as well as study concentration.
Submitted by hei.vn03 on

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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