Many people nowadays don't feel safe either when they are at home or go out .what are the reasons?what can we do to solve this problem.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

While

Accept space

some individuals believe that people feel unsafe at their a residence and

also

Linking Words

when they outside. There are several factors and solutions. I would discuss these both views in upcoming paragraph

Accept space

Firstly

Linking Words

Accept space

the reason why people are afraid of going out of their homes are very obvious

Accept space

the

Suggestion

The

crime

Use synonyms

committed on

streets

Suggestion

the streets

are on a rise. The road accident

have risen

Suggestion

has risen

to a proportion. It

increase

Suggestion

increases

Linking Words

then

conjunction used in comparatives

than

before

Accept space

As well as individuals becoming scared within their

home

Use synonyms

Accept space

Mostly the crimes being committed at houses

for

Linking Words

instance murder

Accept comma addition

instance, murder

Accept space

robberies,

etcetera

Suggestion

Accept space

Linking Words

secondly some

Accept comma addition

Secondly, some

Secondly some

people are afraid to go out because of natural calamities and

also

Linking Words

sometimes due to health related disorders which might be caused

Suggestion

pollution.

Linking Words

However in

Accept comma addition

However, in

a recent news article describe that more crimes committed by domestic help at

people

Suggestion

peoples'

peoples

homes than the

crime

Use synonyms

being committed on the streets

Accept space

Linking Words

addition everyday

Suggestion

addition to everyday

people see news about

terror attacks

Suggestion

the terror attacks

so they avoid

to go

Suggestion

going

outside

Accept space

Linking Words

therefore

Suggestion

Therefore

mankind

feel

Suggestion

feels

insecure on

streets

Suggestion

the streets

and

also

Linking Words

home

Use synonyms

because they about domestic

crime

Use synonyms

newspaper

Suggestion

the newspaper

newspapers

a newspaper

. Contrary about to the statement there are certain solution of the problems

Accept space

Linking Words

moreover

Accept comma addition

Moreover, government

Moreover government

government

Use synonyms

and individuals take steps for

make

Suggestion

making

people more safe and protected. The rising unemployment is the main reason of

these

Suggestion

these crimes

this crime

crime

Use synonyms

. If country are provided good vocational training and good job opportunities

Accept space

it will helpful to reduce

crime

Use synonyms

Accept space

Linking Words

furthermore

Accept comma addition

Furthermore, government

Furthermore government

government

Use synonyms

increase security in public area by camera and more police patrolling

Accept space

Linking Words

this

Suggestion

This

need is

also

Linking Words

in the residence area. The

last

Linking Words

but not least thing is that

Use synonyms

government

Suggestion

the government

should strictly punished the criminals

Accept space

Suggestion

will incredible change to decrease the

crime

Use synonyms

on the streets and at

home

Use synonyms

and

Suggestion

And

people use technology in security system. In the conclusion, nowadays individuals

are not feel

Suggestion

are not feeling

do not feel

are not felt

comfortable at

home

Use synonyms

and outside They afraid

from

Suggestion

crime

Use synonyms

to a very great extent or degree

Use synonyms

government

Suggestion

the government

provide

Suggestion

provides

good facilities

Accept space

nareshThu Apr 11 2019

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
47
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

307 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the coutryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development
Worldwide the population form the countryside is going to live in the cities, this is causing a decline of numbers in the rural areas.
5.5
band
Nowadays, people believe that governments should invest tax-payer’s money in healthcare, others believe that money should be use in other areas. Discuss both points of view and give your opinion.
Some people argue that the government income from taxes is needed to be used only in healthcare; however, a few people are opposed to this statement and think that this money should implement in different areas. From my point of view, the government has to finance the sector which demands more investment in terms of a country’s well-being.
5
band
In some countries, many parents teach their kids that everything can be achieved if they work try enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
In some countries, many parents teach their kids that everything can be achieved if they work try enough. In this essay, both of the positive and negative consequences will be discussed in detail before the conclusion is reached.
4
band
Research shows that business meetings, discussions and training are happening online nowadays. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
Technology has been changing individuals life in terms of business, daily routine in recent years. Considerin job marker, people have started to make online meetings ,instead of conventional way. At that pointi there comes a question to the mind: whether online meetings' advantages outweigh the disadvantages or not. It can be esaily stated that this novelty has been bringing workers life siginificant merits, including better time management and improved life quality.
<4
band
You have seen an advertisement from a couple, who live in Australia, for someone to teach their two children your language for a year.
My name is Zuhra. I am 18 years old. At present, I am studying at university.

Many people nowadays don't feel safe either when they are at home or go out .what are the reasons?what can we do to solve this problem.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the coutryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development

Nowadays, people believe that governments should invest tax-payer’s money in healthcare, others believe that money should be use in other areas. Discuss both points of view and give your opinion.

In some countries, many parents teach their kids that everything can be achieved if they work try enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Research shows that business meetings, discussions and training are happening online nowadays. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

You have seen an advertisement from a couple, who live in Australia, for someone to teach their two children your language for a year.