Some countries encourage teenagers to have part-time job and see it as a good thing, while others disagree. Give your opinion and explain both views.

#countries #teenagers #job

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Recently many

Accept comma addition

Recently, many

countries believe that

work

Use synonyms

part-time is beneficial for younger generation for their better future

Accept space

however

Linking Words

Accept space

others against to

this

Linking Words

argument as teenagers should focus on their studies.In my opinion, I strongly advocate

this

Linking Words

approach that doing part-time

work

Use synonyms

gives numerous benefits to students. On the one hand, one benefit of children doing paid

work

Use synonyms

is that they understand the value of money.

This

Linking Words

also

Linking Words

teaches them not to waste money as they realise the

work

Use synonyms

needed to earn it.

Moreover

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, having a paid job is advantageous because children take their

first

Linking Words

step in learning how to manage and save money. Many older children

Accept space

for instance

Linking Words

work

Use synonyms

for part-time jobs in order to save up for something they would

otherwise

Linking Words

be unable to afford.

Additionally

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, working

enchances

Suggestion

the interpersonal skills of a youngster. These skills help children develop into self-supporting adults ready to enter society and the workplace.

On the other hand

Linking Words

Accept space

most of the

nations

Suggestion

nation

discourages

this

Linking Words

approach of part-time jobs for younger ones due to their studies.

In other words

Linking Words

, the time children spend working digress them from focussing on their higher studies.In fact, having a good education is the key to a

successfull

having succeeded or being marked by a favorable outcome

successful

futureso

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future, so

future so

being employed as a teenager can result in a poor academic

performancewhich

Suggestion

performance which

can be harmful in

teh

definite article

the

long run.

Furthermore

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, in

rudimentary period

Suggestion

the rudimentary period

a rudimentary period

of college students are not enough matured both academically and intellectually to face the challenges of

workplace

Suggestion

the workplace

. To illustrate, as per the recent statistics in "India" most of the prestigious universities abolish part time jobs for their learners. To conclude, while countries may vary in their opinions, I personally believe that working during higher education gives

plethora

Suggestion

a plethora

knowldge

the psychological result of perception and learning and reasoning

knowledge

to the children

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additionally

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, it

broaden

Suggestion

broadens

their horizon of contacts for future.

Submitted by karishma.istk on Thu Apr 11 2019

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

286 words

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Some countries encourage teenagers to have part-time job and see it as a good thing, while others disagree. Give your opinion and explain both views.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Nowadays many people complain that they have difficulties getting enough sleep. What problems can lack of sleep cause? What can be done about lack of sleep?

Zoos are sometimes seen as necessary but not poor alternatives to anatural environment.

Some people believe that cyclists must take exams before being allowed to take part in traffic.

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Rich countries often gives financial aid to developing countries although this not a solution to poverty therefore developed countries should give other types of financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?