IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

All parents want the best opportunities for their children. There are some people who think schools should teach children skills but others think having a range of subjects is better for the children’s future. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#parents #opportunities #children #people #schools #skills #range #subjects #children’s #future
The parents always desire for their children to enjoy the best facilities. It is widely debated whether the children should be given skills training
or
a unit of surface area equal to 100 square meters
are
 taught various subjects at schools. In my opinion, both skills and subjects should be taught in order to make the children physically and mentally capable. On the one hand, there are various benefits of training children on different skills.
Firstly
, physical skills
such
 as sports make the children fitter. With the sedentary lifestyle children have these days, it is imperative for the schools to provide physical training so that children can lead a healthy life.
Secondly
, children who want to become artists can learn from the non-theoretical subjects
such
 as arts, music and dancing. Schools
provide
Suggestion
provides
 an early stage for the future artists which goes a long way in defining a successful career.
On the other hand
, there are equal benefits of teaching various subjects to the children. Once the children come of age, they utilize all theoretical
knowledge
 gained at school in their work life. If subjective
knowledge
 is not given to the children, they will not be able to compete with their coworkers.
Moreover
, the theoretical
knowledge
 learnt at schools helps children secure admission in the university of their choice. For the sake of higher education, the children need to clear aptitude tests or interviews at various universities which are dependent upon their earlier studies. The schools should
therefore
 provide theoretical
knowledge
 In conclusion, I believe that practical skills and theoretical subjects are of equal importance. The schools should maintain a viable balance between practical skills training and theoretical subjects so that the children can learn and benefit from both.
Submitted by hannanalikhan on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Practical skills
  • Financial literacy
  • Cognitive development
  • Critical thinking
  • Well-rounded education
  • Independence
  • Real-life situations
  • Cognitive development
  • Broader understanding
  • Ideal education system
What to do next:
Look at other essays: