IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

The restoration of old buildings in major cities in the world costs numerous governments expenditure. This money should be used in new housing and road development. Do you agree or disagree?

#restoration #buildings #cities #world #costs #governments #expenditure #money #road #development
In these days, governments spend
money
 on the restoration of old monuments in many cities. Some people believe that the same amount of
money
 must spend for other infrastructure projects
such
 as roads and new housing. I disagree with
this
 notion and I will explain why the
money
 spent
for
Suggestion
to
 prevent the old buildings in the upcoming paragraph.
To begin
 with, there are myriad reasons why
i
refers to the speaker or writer
I
 claim that government should
spent
Suggestion
spend
money
 on old monuments. The
first
 and the predominant reason is that old buildings related
with
Suggestion
to
 culture and
history
. With the help of these monuments our young generation can acquire knowledge about their heritage as well as
history
 with
this
 they will connect with their
history
.
For example
, the red fort in New Delhi is
important monument
Suggestion
an important monument
 that reminds to
citizens
Suggestion
the citizens
 of Delhi their past.
Hence
, old buildings are significant to preserve our culture and
history
.
Furthermore
, the old buildings are
important source
Suggestion
an important source
 of
revenue
 for the local individuals. These monuments invite foreign tourists who spent
a
Suggestion
an
 amount of
money
 to see old monuments and buy local products.
For instance
, thousands of tourists visit the Taj Mahal every year and they do not eat delicious food
on
Suggestion
at
in
 local restaurants but
also
 purchase different kind of products.
Moreover
, the government
earn
Suggestion
earns
 tax
revenue
 from old buildings so that they can enhance source
revenue
.
Thus
, old monuments
playa
Suggestion
play
plays
played
 a vital role to increase the income of locals and authorities. In conclusion, governments
should spent
Suggestion
should spend
money
of
Suggestion
on
for
 the restoration of old buildings because it has extremely important
from
Suggestion
for
 the culture and increase the
revenue
 of local individuals and government.
Submitted by naresh on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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